Otto Family Adventure

Low Expectations

2012-01-10T20:05:00.002-05:00

I have one New Year's resolution, and it may sound a wee bit odd.

I want to keep my expectations low.

Yep. That's it.

Now, in the past, I would have seen that as a negative, as another chance to look at life through a cynical lens, but now...now....I see it as a gift. I learned this, as I learn most things, from my children.

On New Year's Eve, we decided to do something as a family, since we'd had a lot of time apart travelling the past few weeks. We packed everybody up in the car, swimsuits on and goggles in hand. Now, you have to understand that we are former Floridians and we loooove a good swim in the pool or the ocean. There, we used to live in a neighborhood with a community pool which, upon our arrival, quickly became a just-our-family-pool as the retiree neighbors ran away. I'll never understand why the arrival of 3 kids with noodles, squirt guns, homemade parachutes, boats and rafts would bother them. But I digress.

We also had one of the country's most beautiful beaches 10 minutes from our house, conveniently located across the street from the world's best donut shop. Needless to say, we frequented the beach....ah...frequently.

In Guatemala, we have missed the water. The beach is an hour and a half away, and while it is undeniably beautiful, the waves are rough and the sand is black, volcanic stuff that I find myself digging out of my kids' ears for days after. We enjoy it, but it takes a village to get there.

So. Back to New Year's Eve and the Great Pool Expedition. We were willing to cough up some extra quetzales and do what it took to enjoy a little sun and water. We oh-so-non-stealthily dragged ourselves, our beach bag, and our three slightly excited children into the local well-appointed, posh hotel and presented our desire to pay for the use of the pool.

Ummmm....No. Not that day. Turns out there were so many guests in town that the pool was closed to outsiders such as ourselves.

Ok...I was quite disappointed, but, having been a mom for just a few years, didn't let it show and turned to console my children...only to find that they were completely nonplussed by the whole thing. Their dad informed them that we would try another hotel, so we loaded all the children plus aforementioned gear and towels back into the car and drove to our next destination.

Ummmm.....No. Not that day. Turns out you had to purchase a lunch buffet...pay $20...blah, blah, blah.

Having been a mom for a few years, I turned to console....what?? My children were still nonplussed. Getting a little sad, but still....maintaining a ridiculously positive attitude. It's tricky when they act more mature than I do.

Finally...we ended up at a glorified cement pond near our house....and my children splashed and played like it was the most upscale, four-star pool they'd ever seen. Nobody complained, nobody whined about the fact that the water was a frigid 70 degrees (did I mention we're Floridians?? We're used to 90 degree heated pools!). We ate our PB&J's and made fantastic memories together.

Watching my kids splash around in what, for most middle-class kids, would be a boring place (no slides, no kiddie pool, no diving board), I felt prouder of them than I can describe, and more convicted to be childlike. Keeping my expectations low. I thought I'd learned that here, but I often use cynicism disguised as low expectations, and that's just plain being negative. If I am truly approaching my life as a gift, I will keep my hands open and my eyes up and look for the gifts along the way...not expecting them, but celebrating them when they happen, even when they don't look exactly the way I'd planned they would.

And they happen every day.

More Than Enough

2012-01-03T19:22:00.003-05:00

I really, really wanted to complain tonight. I'd spent two hours in the kitchen baking bread for tomorrow and cooking dinner for tonight (this after the exhausting trip to the Bode for the ingredients, and the task of disinfecting every piece of produce and refilling the water purifier that I use for cooking and cleaning the veggies).

I really, really wanted to take advantage of the fact that my kids were outside and say some of my favorite four letter words as my non-self-lighting gas oven decided to have a mind of its own and shoot up to 400 degrees, thereby burning aforementioned bread. And just yesterday, it would barely get up to 300.

I was going to have a little pity party about how, even after spending such a long time in the kitchen, one or more of my sweet, beloved children would certainly find something in the dinner that he didn't "care for." Someone would ask, ever-so-politely-as-he-has-been-warned-to-do (sub-text: threatened with immediate bedtime or other drastic punishment), "Mom...um...how much do I have to eat??"

Before I could oh so justifiably hit the red button on my full-scale pity party, I had an inconvenient memory.

I remembered a day last summer when my family and I went to the village of Santa Maria de Jesus, just 20 minutes away from us.

I remembered watching as the women in the local church there served a hot lunch to over 100 small children, many of whom were enjoying their only hot meal in days, many of whom had brought two or more siblings along with them and were feeding them before they ate their own lunch...many of whom had orange streaks in what should have been jet-black hair, indicating severe malnutrition.

I remembered feeling like I should help cook or clean up, and going to the back of the church, to the pastor's home, only to find that these women had cooked for over 100 children with no stove. No sink. No counter. No food processor. No visible appliance of any kind. Just an open fire, backbreaking work for hours, and an intense desire to physically feed and spiritually nourish the children in their community.

There is a great accountability in knowing. Once you have seen and known, you cannot pretend that you don't know. You have a choice to forget, to shove aside what you have seen, or to remember and choose to be incredibly grateful for what you used to take for granted. After nearly four years here, there are too many things to begin to count for which I can never complain about again. And while yes, sometimes that is annoyingly inconvenient, in reality it is a gift. I don't want to be the same as before.

So, tonight, as my family sits down to (what I think is) a delicious dinner of pasta and salad and then wakes up to warm pumpkin bread, I will remember that there is a woman out there, just up the mountain, who is cooking over an open fire a very simple meal for her family. And I will choose to be grateful for my beautiful kitchen, the laughter (and yes, arguments) of my children, and the reminder that I have no need to worry about tomorrow. I have more than enough for today.

Do Re Mi

2011-12-28T21:09:00.002-05:00

I have heard it from enough people now that I believe it is an empirically proven fact: Moms who play the piano should not actually TEACH their children to play the piano.

Ugh. I took great pride in the fact that this could not be true for me at least....that I could certainly save our family a lot of running around and a lot of money by simply teaching my children the "Good Boys Do Fine Always" rules. And the rests. And the half notes. And the scales.

Apparently, in this case, as in many others, I do not rise above the rules and laws of nature. I get much too distracted during their practice times when I hear a wrong note. It is much too difficult to NOT stop and correct said note. I'm sure my mother never struggled with this. After all, she just listened to me practice, blissfully unaware of what things should have been sharped and which should have been flatted. To this day, she swears she loved to hear me practice.

There was a bit of poetic justice recently when, upon hearing me bang out some old Baptist offertory arrangements on my parents' piano (fyi the Baptists like their songs loud and full of arpeggios and glissandos...more amens that way) my youngest son commented..."Wow. I didn't know my mom could play the piano so good."

Amen, brother. Amen. Now go practice your scales. And I'll ignore that missed note. Just this once.

Dear Publix

2011-12-27T19:54:00.000-05:00

Dear Publix,

I need to apologize to you. Because...oh....lo these many years I have taken you for granted. Your clean, brightly-lit wide aisles. Your ability to stock when customers are NOT in the store. Your always possessing such apparently exotic items such as sour cream. And popcorn. Your paper-or-plastic bags for which I did not have to pay. Your carrying my groceries to my car WITHOUT asking for money. Your free bagging. Your pleasantries...hello, goodbye, have a nice day.

Oh dear, sweet Publix. I will never take you for granted again. And while I acknowledge that yes, my Bodegona (aka grocery store) is far better than it was a few years ago..from what I hear, people needed to wear closed-toe shoes in the past in order to avoid feeling the rats running across their feet....I miss your generic ice-cream that rivaled Breyer's and Edy's. And I miss the helpful workers in the ugly green vests. And I miss the free balloons and cookies. Oh. Yeah. That was for my kids. I digress....

To sum up: while I miss shopping at the place where I never truly appreciated that "shopping is a pleasure," I will choose to be grateful today that my dear old Bode DID have sour cream....and DID have the eggnog that my teenage son requested....and that I DID have everything I needed to make a nutritious dinner for my family.

But next time I'm back in Florida.....Publix Moose Tracks Premium Ice Cream is at the top of my list. And I'll take it in a plastic bag. Just because I can.

Looking Back

2011-11-13T17:59:00.001-05:00

Our family has the somewhat schmaltzy tradition of taking time, each child's birthday, to look back at the photos and videos of the day he or she was born.

Let's be clear that I instituted this tradition, and I am also the only one who tears up each time.

We recently celebrated the birthdays of Nate and Jackson, and we oohed and aahed our way through the moments they first met the world and the moments they first met their siblings and the moments where they muttered unintelligible words. Side note: I am amazed by my linguistic abilities in the past. Toddler-speak is much more difficult than Spanish!

I digress. In the weeks leading up to our move to Guatemala 3 1/2 years ago, Steve spent hours transferring our home movies and pictures to our computers. I spent hours this week going through them, and my heart simply welled up.

First, I asked myself HOW I could possibly be the parent of three such beautiful children when, inside, I still feel like I have the maturity of a 20 year old? Surely, somebody is going to knock on my door and say, "Thanks for babysitting. I'll take them home now!"

Second, nobody, and I mean noooobody looks good in the days and weeks after having a baby. Husbands and family should be required to sign an agreement that, upon punishment of death, they will photoshop said photos.

Third, and the real point here is this: sometimes I have avoided looking back at old pictures because, let's face it, life is messy. Not all memories are sweet. Some aren't even bittersweet. They're downright painful. So it's easier just to choose to ignore the memories altogether. But, when I sifted through those old photos this week, I was reminded again of what a rich and amazing life I've had so far in my 38ish years, of what laughs and antics I've performed trying to get kiddos to smile for a photo, of the tiredness and zombieness of having 3 kids under the age of 5, of the sheer joy of FINALLY getting that baby to laugh WHILE the video camera is rolling! The trips, the Christmases, the simple moments of playing in the backyard and drinking from the hose. The books we've read, the people we've come to treasure, the fashions we've thought looked good!

Life hasn't always made sense, but it has been rich in love, in family, in friendships....and it's even been adventurous at times!

God reminded his people to remember, to look back at the blessings and the miracles he'd performed. I'm sure not all of their memories were good either, but if they reminded each other of the gifts and miracles in their lives, they could travel farther and stronger and be encouraged together.

So today I look back with a full heart. Life is never perfect, no matter what our Facebook statuses sometimes say. But we can remember how far we have come and how many new memories and photos are still ahead.

In the meantime, I have to go break up an argument in the backyard over who is winning in the Nerf battle. But maybe I'll take a photo first. Just to remember.

Grace and More Grace

2011-10-15T22:19:00.000-04:00

I would like to think that I'm a grown-up now. But then there are weeks like this one where I realize that I am as stubborn and as heels-dug-in as a two year old. Days when my head tells me the mature way to handle stress, the right way to respond to it, but my emotions say a resounding "lalalalalala....I can't hear you!" and then, quite promptly, take over.

It usually takes me a few minutes to realize that I have blown it, once again. A few minutes more to realize that, because I believe in grace...scandalous, complete grace....I can choose to be forgiven and move on. And try to do it better next time!

The biggest constant in my life, in most lives..is change. And I'm fighting it hard right now. I find comfort in sameness, in routine. But when that is all blown to smithereens, as stressful and difficult as that is, it is a reminder that whatever I thought I controlled, I don't. Nope. Not even a little bit. It's humbling and reviving at the same time. And I'll probably forget it again tomorrow, but then there's that grace thing again. I want to live in it, wallow in it, love like crazy with it.

So even if I never do feel like the grown-up I should be, at least I am certain of one thing....I will experience another challenge, another change tomorrow. Maybe tonight! And I can cling to that grace to be a little stronger this time, a little more mature....a step more than the toddler stage. Maybe even a preschooler. Grace and peace.

Grace

2011-06-29T21:32:00.001-04:00

Sometimes you read something that slaps you upside the head, turns you upside down, and shakes you. Man. I hate it when that happens. So this is what I read the other day:

“There are two ways through life: the way of nature, and the way of Grace. You have to choose which one you’ll follow. . . .Grace doesn’t try to please itself. Accepts being slighted, forgotten, disliked. Accepts insults and injuries. . . .Nature only wants to please itself. Get others to please it too. Likes to lord it over them. To have its own way. It finds reasons to be unhappy when all the world is shining around it. And love is smiling through all things.” from Tree of Life

I've been reminded lately that there are approximately 82,524 reasons each day to be hurt and offended. And some days 82,525. Somebody says something that could be construed as criticism, or maybe he doesn't say something he should have said, or maybe he/she ignores me altogether. My immediate reaction is to think, "What is wrong with me? What did I do?" and, if I can't figure that out, the next logical step MUST be to assume that this person is just mean, hurtful and maybe....gasp....human. Huh.

I also read once (I think in a Beth Moore book) that if I am a person who goes through life with an empty cup, holding it out for others to fill it, I will be consistently disappointed and hurt. If I take responsibility for my own cup, filling it with the satisfaction that comes from investing in things outside of myself and my own little world, I will be able to pour out that full cup on my family, my friends, my community. And if I allow myself to be filled up with Grace, a Grace I can't possibly explain or earn, but can simply receive, then I have Grace to spare for the people I love. Or even the people I don't love so much.

Yes, I will get up tomorrow and once again be presented with countless opportunities to be hurt or offended. But I have a choice...to look at that potential offense and choose to leave it there, to not even pick it up, or to obsess and carry it around with me, clouding every interaction I have for the rest of the day. I hope I choose wisely. But, if I don't, there is Grace enough for me, too.

Sacrifice

2011-05-16T17:28:00.000-04:00

With all of the uproar surrounding the news of Osama Bin Laden's death, and all of the coverage that mentioned the Navy Seals who so bravely faced danger for our nation's benefit, I was reminded of something that occurred two years ago.

Our family went to a beach here in Guate for a little R&R. We were blessed by friends to stay at a lovely resort and just relax for a few days. One night, we went to the hotel's restaurant for the buffet dinner and noticed a table full of American men near us. Now. My husband graduated from the Air Force Academy and spent several years as an AF officer, so he can pretty much spot a military man or woman from 80 paces. He knew immediately that these men were military.

We didn't see them again until the day we checked out. They happened to be checking out at the same time, and Steve approached them. He made small talk and mentioned that he'd been in the Air Force. True to military form, they ribbed him and told him they were sorry he'd been in that particular branch and then told him they were in Guatemala for some training. There was more small talk, during which they revealed nothing specific about their training, and, at the end of our time in the lobby, Steve thanked them for their service to our country. It was then that one of the guys really opened up and told us that, indeed, their duty had cost them each greatly. He told us that most, if not all, of the men in his group were divorced or nearly divorced. He explained that they were gone from their families for most of the year.

It was a very sobering reminder of just how much our military sacrifices for us. And a reminder that the United States, despite all of the flaws that are constantly pointed out to us by the talking heads on TV, is a country that has always been known as a country willing to sacrifice for the greater good.

There is nothing like living in another country to give you perspective on just how unique America is. We are willing to fight for those who don't have a voice, to defend the weak, to pursue justice to its end....sometimes to a fault....and why? Because sometimes individual people sacrifice their rights and, often even their lives for the greater good.

It has taken living in a "survival-driven" society, a society in which people have been taught to look out for themselves, a society in which daily needs like food and a place to sleep are very real worries to teach me just how blessed we as Americans are.

But working for the greater good isn't merely an option or a nice choice for us:

"Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too." Phil 2:4 NLT

I am so thankful for the United States, so thankful for a heritage we have of sacrificing for others. And hopeful that we will never take it for granted again.

Justice

2011-02-02T23:01:00.003-05:00

I entered the United States Air Force in 1994 after graduating from the Air Force Academy. I was trained to think critically, to honor, to defend the weak, to promote justice. I was paid very modestly, but it didn't matter. I served with pride, my chest swelling to think I could be involved in something so incredibly intangible as the defense of our American freedoms. That whatever work I did behind the scenes as a support officer would save lives in battle.

Only a 2 hour plane ride from where I served in the military, Guatemala was in the last 2 years of a 36 year civil war. 200,000 civilians were murdered. The government committed horrible war crimes... through its military.

Tonight I came home to find a neighbor with one of his relatives waiting by my front porch with a letter in his hand. They asked if I could help them translate a letter. I was tired, hungry, and frankly, a bit annoyed to hear that the man needed it to be finished within an hour. I asked if I could eat dinner with my family and have it ready in two hours. He agreed to wait, and I agreed to help.

Here is an excerpt of the letter, with his name removed for confidentiality:

To Whom it may concern:

.... I served in the Guatemalan military during the Guatemalan Civil War, in which the military committed many crimes against humanity. On January 6^th, 1996, I deserted the military, due to direct orders contrary to my conscience, which were intended to cause harm to defenseless civilians. Specifically, we were ordered to patrol at night for unsuspecting youth, capture them, and force them into military service against their will.

On the 9^th of January, 1996, I left for the United States where I found gainful employment. On May 7^th, 2002, I crossed the border of the United States near Detroit, Michigan, and entered Canada (through Winsor) to seek refuge.

I sought refuge in Canada because I was afraid of the cruel punishment and reprisals that the Guatemalan military intended to make against me because I deserted. The reputation of the Guatemalan military was that it always hunted down and punished deserters....

Injustice. Most of the world suffers terribly from governments, politicians, or employers who oppress and take advantage of those they are supposed to serve.

However, justice is not just a right as an American or a Christian. It's a responsibility we have as human beings, to defend others who are too weak to do it for themselves. We snooze through our history classes, we chafe in the politically correct corporate training courses. We gloss over it when Jesus commands it. We become too bothered, too busy, too bored, to care.

I was almost too busy to help this man. Afterwards, he asked me how much he owed me for translating, and I was speechless. He had already paid me. He had given me an appreciation for something that I had assumed was normal, universal, my right, everyone's right. An appreciation and a reminder of something I have taken for granted for too long.

Gratitude

2011-01-20T20:20:00.001-05:00

Instead of starting out the new year with a list of resolutions that are destined to make me feel like a failure before I turn the calendar page to February, I am resolving to live a year of gratitude, a year of being thankful for the astounding number of gifts in my life.

Gratitude for the beautiful gift of my family, from parents and siblings to the children that run down my stairs each morning with limitless energy and joy, ready to see what the day holds for them.

Gratitude for the chance to experience life in a different country. Along with its challenges and frustrations, it also gives me a new perspective and appreciation that I don't think I could obtain any other way.

Gratitude for our health, for the wealth of food in our kitchen, for the comforts of our home that we take for granted over and over again.

Gratitude for the intangible things...the way God is changing and sifting and growing my heart, giving me new desires and new dreams.

Gratitude for the chance, every now and then, to get a glimpse of lessons taking root....those things that I have taught my children, the whole time wondering if the words were even being heard. To see the seedlings pushing their way up through the soil is perhaps the most beautiful thing I could ever witness.

Gratitude for a multitude of things. Many more things than those frustrating, and yes, let's be honest, often discouraging and disheartening things that I routinely choose to focus on. That's the key anyway. To choose. I am old enough and cynical enough to know that I will fail at that choice quite often in this new year and will throw myself one amazing pity party. But I can get up the next morning and clean up the wreck of that party and choose again.

To be grateful.

"I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder."
Gilbert K. Chesterton

"Tortillas and Coffee as Baby Food?"

2011-01-09T21:34:00.004-05:00

Video: ABC News Special on Malnutrition in Guatemala

Expectations

2010-11-11T17:17:00.000-05:00

Several months ago, someone gave us very good advice. "Don't bash the country you are living in," they told us. "Especially in front of your children."
Now, this might not sound like a big deal, or might not seem that it would be difficult advice to follow. It is.
No matter where we live, we are still very American. We are American in our thinking, our way of getting things done, in our expectations, and that can cause quite a bit of stress in our daily interactions.

We expect to order something and have it arrive on time, from little things like food to big things like construction materials for team projects.

We expect to be able to go to an ATM and get out cash.

We expect to pay the same price for vegetables that the person next to us is paying.

We expect to have the customer service we'd find at say, a Target store.....things like employees offering to help find something, or opening another register instead of requiring people to wait in line for 45 minutes, or not stocking shelves in the busiest part of the day in a 3 foot wide aisle.

Difficult? You bet. There are times that we complain and whine about how things are messed up. And yet, when we stop, take a breath and remind ourselves that people are mainly trying to survive, to get through the day, it changes our perspective and gives us a bit more patience.

Now, we're not perfect at this. Far from it. I still haven't gotten used to riding the chicken bus and having my foot stepped on 14 times or being shoved out of the way in the market, but at least I don't take it personally anymore. Well, mostly.

My wish is that, one day, when we move from Guatemala, whether it's to the States or to another place, we will be able to hold onto the lessons we're learning here, that we'll never adopt a sense of entitlement or superiority, and that we'll remember to look behind the differences and see the similarities....that people are people, with the same hurts and desires and hopes, no matter where they live, that we will consciously choose to look for the good in people.

Another good friend gave us more valuable advice. She told us to remind ourselves that, "It's not wrong, it's just different." So, on those really crazy days when we are tempted to see everything in a negative light, we repeat that phrase.
A lot.
And sometimes even out loud in the middle of that so-very-unlike-Target store. Until we can say it and mean it.

Happy Birthday, Nate!

2010-10-17T09:25:00.000-04:00

It was the perfect fall night.
The stereotypical fall night, actually. The smell of woodsmoke, the crisp air, the changing leaves. And it was the night that I realized that my life would never be the same.

A week earlier, I had given birth to a 9 1/2 pound baby boy. Now, my whole pregnancy had progressed perfectly. No problems, no worries. Until the end, when things just started to seem "off" and I began going in more often for monitoring. This normally would not have been a huge cause for alarm bells to go off in my head, but, tragically, two of our friends had lost babies very close to their due dates, and so I began to worry. A lot. I began to obsess with getting my baby born, healthy and whole. I knew if I could just make sure he made it through delivery o.k, then I could breathe a sigh of relief and all would be back to normal.

Wow. I really had no clue what was about to become of my peaceful little in-control world.

First of all, nothing went as planned for the delivery. Nothing. I had imagined some scene out of a movie where I'd be looking spectacular, with freshly-applied lipstick and perfect hair. Perhaps my mom or Steve would be blotting my face and bringing me sips of water. Yep. None of that really happened. I know my mom and Steve were fabulous during the whole ordeal, but I clearly did NOT look amazing and I did NOT have the storybook moment of bonding and happy-crying and holding my baby immediately. Instead, 36 hours into labor, we made the difficult decision to have a c-section, and then our son was born blue and unresponsive.

All I remember was thinking, "This is not happening. There is no way that he is not going to be ok!" I kept sending Steve over to check on him, and I know now that he was trying to comfort me, because he kept coming back to tell me that, "He's fine!" when, in fact, he wasn't.

I didn't get to hold him until that night, and although he was covered with alarms, wires and had an I.V. stuck into his little arm, he was beautiful, and I marveled at the fact that he belonged to us.
We were very blessed, because our story ended well and happy after that initial week in ICU, and I know that others don't have that happy ending.

I think it was this understanding that gripped me on that perfect fall night. We'd left Nathan home with my mom so we could take a stroll, just Steve and I. And that's when I began to panic. I'd been banking on the fact that, once he was born, I wouldn't worry about him like I had when I'd been the only person who could care for him, and now I was shocked and actually scared to realize that my heart had been laid wide open by this little person, and that we were totally, utterly responsible for him. I was scared to death.

And yet, somehow, here we are 12 years later. Miraculously, he is healthy, well, happy, strong, and one of the most amazing people I know. When I say it is by the grace of God, I don't exaggerate. We have walked (and sometimes been dragged!) through some heavy stuff, and so we don't take a thing like a birthday for granted. We celebrate like crazy people, because we know just how blessed we are to have each other.
And really, isn't this how life is? Things rarely turn out the way we envisioned....college, job, marriage, parenthood, you name it.

The challenge is whether we get stuck in the "what if's," the "I-can't-believe-this-is-my-life" pity party, or whether we believe that there is a Greater Love, a greater plan, a greater hope.
And even if there are still difficult times ahead, and even if it still doesn't turn out the way we'd wanted, we don't have to waste today worrying. We can just take a breath, enjoy, and choose to be grateful.

If I could go back and talk to that very young, very scared new mom, I'd tell her that she would not believe how ridiculously fast the years would pass, how many things she would wish she'd cherished along the way, and how, no matter what, it was all going to be o.k.

Then I'd tell her to throw her hands up, let go, and enjoy the ride.

Happy Birthday, Nathan!

El Es El Camino - He is the Way

2010-09-26T18:58:00.004-04:00

This is the official name for the new community built for 12 of the families who lost their homes in Agatha. No less than 5 different churches have worked together to clear land, dig ditches, and build 6 homes from July through September.

We expect the remaining 6 homes to be built by the end of October, and remaining infrastructure (bathrooms, kitchens, electricity, etc.) should be completed by the end of the year. But, it's also about building relationships.

Here are a few photos of the outreach opportunities with the families impacted by the storms.

South Tulsa Baptist Church shares their morning devotions with over a dozen workers from the city of Pastores.

Pastor Ted Shares the Gospel with 10 of the 12 families who will receive houses. The mayor of Pastores is reading his copy of the Bible (one was handed to each family and worker), and Abner (Steve's co-worker) helps translate.

A Pastores worker reads his new Bible during his break.

Some of the young construction workers show their new Bibles.

The families visited their new homes (that were in the process of being built), and were also given baskets of clothes and food as a house-warming gift.

Steve with Abner and Mayor Miguel Lopez of Pastores.

Storms, Slides, Statistics & Surprises

2010-09-26T18:51:00.001-04:00

Three tropical storms since June have caused hundreds of major landslides in Guatemala leaving: 175+ dead, 10,000 evacuated and 40,000 homeless. Even as we write, rain pours from Tropical Storm Matthew and we receive double the normal rainfall this year. Vital crops are failing, hunger and disease loom.

Hopelessness... helplessness.

This is the state of mind of many in Guatemala.

We are blessed to have a church focused on the broken-hearted, and our goal is to meet needs to heal both physical and spiritual needs. Many like-minded churches have joined us this year to turn hopeless situations into incredible opportunities to showcase God's love and power.

In spite of the obstacles, many Christians have arrived to share laughter, friendship, hard work, and encouragement.

Here are a few pictures of the devastation only 5 miles from where we live.

Floodwaters broke through this retaining wall (click on the image for more detail)

Pastor Tim and Jeanette in front of a home destroyed. The family will be re-located to the new homes being built.

Here's a few pictures of some of the team activities not deterred from the storms:

One of the families who lost everything from the storm and are being re-located. Calvary Baptist Church of Winter Haven spent an hour with this family, distributing clothing and sharing the Gospel in addition to building a new home for them.

We shared God's love last week with men from a homeless shelter.

Pastor Ted from South Tulsa Baptist Church and Pastor Mike visited another pastor and his family near Antigua to find opportunities to help their church on future team visits.

Abner (co-worker with Steve) translates the Evangi-Cube to children at a VBS near Antigua.

Everything I Need to Know I Learned From My Kids

2010-09-18T16:34:00.000-04:00

Before I became a mom, I used to think of myself as a pretty intelligent person. Little did I know. Now, every day, multiple times a day, I am asked questions to which I have no. earthly. idea what the answer could possibly be. Why, oh why didn't I pay more attention in science class? Or history class....or math class for that matter.

Thank goodness for Google and Wikipedia. They save my pride more times than I care to admit.

Other than the prolific amount of academic minutiae I am re-learning with my kids, there are emotional and spiritual lessons to be had, too, and so many ways that I realize I have grown up way too much and need to remember some simple, childlike qualities, such as...

Forgiveness. It always amazes me how kids are so quick to forgive. You apologize, and they are over it. And then later, when motivated by the ever-present "Mom Guilt," you re-apologize, you are bound to hear, "Mom, you already said you were sorry." Oh yeah. I did. And I guess I really am forgiven. Amazing.

Wonder. I used to walk down the street and be grossed out by insects, snakes, and rodents. Not anymore. They are now a stimulus for examination, discovery and discussion. That roly-poly? I used to find it annoying. Now when I see it crawling across my floor, I know I have to call in the kids, because someone is bound to want to hold it for awhile. The other day, I saw a 6 foot long snake when I was out running. My jumping-up-into-my throat heart was thankful it was dead, but my next thought was how I wished I could take it home to the kids, and how they would love to check it out. What on earth has happened to me!?

Laughter. My kids recently informed me that children laugh hundreds of times a day, and that adults only laugh a few. It's so true. I want to adopt their attitude of finding humor and joy in every little thing, from blowing bubblegum until it pops all over your face to going down a slide into a freezing cold pool and not minding a bit. The things that I find passe, they find exhilarating. This was never more clear to me than when Jack and I were going through security at the airport and he kept asking me WHEN we got to take our shoes off, because that was "his favorite part." Really?? Never would have crossed my mind to find fun in that before, but now I certainly will.

Appreciation. When the power goes out, as it did last night, I get frustrated. For my kids, it is a chance to build pillow forts in the living room and snuggle up in them with a book and a flashlight. There's no distraction from a computer or a movie. It's simply time to be together and maybe even take advantage of the darkness to see how much brighter the stars appear.

Love. I was always told that there is no love like the one you have for your children, and while that is more true than I ever could have dreamed, no one prepared me for the love that they give in return...

Unconditional. Never, ever concerned with how I look....they could care less about that.

Uninhibited. There is never a shortage of hugs and sloppy kisses and "I love you's."

Unquestioned. They never agonize over how they feel. We love each other, and that is it.

So, I don't think I'll let today go by without a little extra squeeze for my kiddos, and maybe a stroll down the street for some ice cream. Just because. Oh yeah. And that cricket that kept me awake last night? Maybe I won't mush it when I find it. Maybe I'll share the wonder over it, just a little.

Grandparents

2010-09-12T23:06:00.000-04:00

I realized, only by looking at my calendar, that it was Grandparents' Day today. This is not a holiday that is celebrated in Guatemala, and I don't remember it being a big deal when I lived in the U.S. However, I felt very sentimental this morning, because it was a reminder to me that I only have one grandparent left. And it was also a reminder that I have been blessed to have so many happy memories of my grandparents. Because of that, I do believe I am an expert in what makes a Good Grandparent, and so.....here is the definitive list (or, in any case, my opinion)
A Good Grandparent always shows (or feigns) interest in whatever topic a grandchild wishes to discuss. One must be prepared, because this could encompass any topic, from the ever-so-enthralling detail of what said grandchild ate for breakfast, to the origin of black holes, to the question of which is the most dangerous animal on the planet.
A Good Grandparent delights in serving nutritious, delicious meals to his/her grandchild. The meal usually consists of an icee composed of sugar and red dye #2, washed down with a Mountain Dew. For balance, you see.
A Good Grandparent is an expert in the art of good-night storytelling. The story must be exciting, adventurous, and yet, at the same time, devoid of anything scary or nightmare-inducing.
A Good Grandparent never tires of answering questions, especially those that begin with, "Why?"
A Good Grandparent can make up, er...I mean, accurately recite, stories from his or her childhood in which he or she always ends up being the hero.
A Good Grandparent keeps toys and books around, even though she may not see her grandchildren for months.....just in case.
A Good Grandparent is never too busy to put down an all-important project in order to dance to a song, or drive down the road to see a horse, or listen to a silly knock-knock joke and pretend NOT to know the answer.
A Good Grandparent makes a grandchild feel like he is the most interesting person he has ever met, and that nothing could be more exciting than what they are doing together at that moment.

I am incredibly blessed to have had grandparents who gave me a rich treasury of memories, and even more so to have parents and in-laws who are giving my children the same gift.
Happy Grandparents' Day indeed.

Beach adventure: Life in Guatemala!

2010-08-13T19:31:00.000-04:00

Well, my latest adventure was when I went to the beach. First, I played in the pool at the beach with the team. Second, we went on the beach. I made sand-castles, swam in the waves,and rode a ATV! It was awesome! Mr. Ric and I got chased by some dogs-twice! Then Pastor Andrew's ATV died!
( it means it wouldn't go anymore)! So we went to get help. We told the life guard, who went there.
He fixed it, and we returned the ATV's. I'm riding the ATV with Mr. Rick in the picture!

A Major Step...

2010-07-26T23:49:00.001-04:00

It's not very often that you can step back and get one of life's bigger perspectives. This weekend we had one of those.

After 2+ years of coordinating teams from the United States to help the hurting, forge new relationships, and spread the Gospel here in Antigua, Guatemala, we had the opportunity to do just that again. But, this time it was at a whole new level... without teams... and mostly our own church. It all started a few weeks ago when some local students approached our church to ask for help organizing some event details, and, through that relationship, they invited us to present the Gospel at the clinic.

Wow!

This kind of stuff doesn't happen every day. A group of over 20 volunteers from our church quickly mobilized to share games, face-painting, coloring, testimonies, music, and children's Evangicubes to clearly share the Gospel. Over 70 families were seen by the doctor, and over 70 families heard about the Great Physician. One of the Police Chaplains prayed with each family as they left the doctor's office, and one person accepted Christ. Incredible!

This was also an event that our whole family got involved in for several hours, and it was a great opportunity to get perspective on why we're here... one person at a time.

Sand in My Suitcase

2010-06-09T20:08:00.002-04:00

I'm not a fan of unpacking. Now packing a suitcase, that's a different story. There's so much anticipation, the imagining of what the trip will be like, the expectation of reuniting with family and friends, the excitement of a long-awaited vacation from the daily grind.

But unpacking is bittersweet. And when I do it right after arriving home, like I did this trip, there's more bitter than sweet.

Oh yes, there's still the thrill of unloading all of the things we were blessed enough to purchase, the fun of putting them in their new places.
But there's also the sand. And the sand is what brings on the tears.

You see, on this trip, we got to share three amazing days on the beach with our family, soaking up the sun, the waves, and each other. While we were there, I had an epiphany: when we lived near family and friends, we all too often took them for granted. We knew we could see them anytime, that they were just around the corner...and while we saw them as often as we could, we didn't cherish that gift like we do now.

But on vacation, we simply lived life with those we love.

I got to wake up each morning and drink coffee with my sweet friend Melanie.

I got to watch her kids and mine pick up their friendship right where they'd left off.

I had the luxury of spending a couple of hours walking to and from Starbucks with my sister-in-law and brother, hours in which we shared our thoughts and our hearts with each other.

I got to make an early morning donut-run with my grandma, a woman whose shared wisdom is precious to me.

I had plenty of delightful, "let's just hang out together" time with my niece and my brother.

I spent priceless hours on the beach with my kids and loved watching my dad and mom watch their grandkids.

I had the talks I can never get enough of with my mom...the kind where we can go from oohing and aahing over cookbooks to telling our hopes and dreams for each other in a matter of minutes.

And so, while the sand-encrusted swimsuits in my suitcase (and the myriad of shells I fished out that eventually ended up in the bottom of my washing machine) made my heart physically hurt with the missing, and while the tears I'd tried to squelch came up....it was impossible for me to forget just how ridiculously blessed we are.

To have family and friends who love us and express that love to us.
To spend hours with those we love and have the freedom to debate, to laugh with (and at!) each other, to accept and actually like each other.
To get to see them as often as we do and know that, for that brief moment, we will all put the busyness of our lives on hold in order to take advantage of every hour together.

So, I'll take the "bitter" in the unpacking, because I got to taste the sweet, and now I get to savor the memory of that.
I'll dump out that sandy suitcase and hold onto those memories.

And dream about next year.

Oh No He Didn't

2010-05-11T10:28:00.001-04:00

This past weekend, we enjoyed a long-overdue getaway to Lake Atitlan. It is the deepest lake in Central America and is shaped by three volcanoes.
We swam, canoed, read, ate, and just relaxed together as a family. The surroundings were breath-taking.
And peaceful.
Until Jackson decided to share his wildly entertaining personality with the other guests.

Steve & I were sitting by the pool taking in the view of the lake and keeping an eye on Jack, who was splashing around in the hot tub. The quiet moment was interrupted when Jackson suddenly stood up and announced LOUDLY, "Dad, I just peed in the hot tub."
Whaaaat????
And again.
"DAD, I JUST PEED IN THE HOT TUB!"
I jumped up, not quite in time to stop him from announcing it AGAIN. LOUDLY. I told him I'd take him to the bathroom. At this suggestion, he replied, "I CAN'T STOP!"

At this moment, all of the other guests, who'd been very politely pretending that they couldn't hear our sweet little boy could not hold it together any longer, and everyone completely erupted in laughter.

Steve managed to get Jackson out of the tub while he (Jackson) was in mid-sentence informing everyone that, "It's weird, because the hot tub doesn't smell any different now."

More wild laughter.

We hustled him off to the restroom, and joked with the other families that we were pretty sure we wouldn't have to share the hot tub for the rest of the day. All was quiet again, and everyone went back to their reading and relaxing.
Until Jackson ran back to the pool and let us all know, "I didn't have to go anymore."
Surely our proudest moment as parents.

Well, This Was a First

2010-04-28T22:07:00.001-04:00

Building houses is something that our teams do here. A lot. There's always a huge need for decent shelter for families, since many of them live in conditions that Americans would call slums.

Two weeks ago, a team from Georgia was here and built a home for a family of 4 living together in one room. And not a very big room at that. Our people constructed a much bigger, more sanitary structure that would keep out the rodents and insects and keep the family safe from the elements. The family was so touched by all that was done for them that they decided to make a special gesture of gratitude.

Now, this is not abnormal. Typically, a family who is receiving a home does not have much to give monetarily, but they will do things like buy drinks for the team or maybe share some treats. But this time was different.

The young woman of the family announced to our team that, to show her gratitude, she was going to change her son's middle name.

To Steve.

As in OUR Steve.

When Steve heard this, he was a little bit in shock, but he quickly recovered and posed for a picture with his new namesake.

Good thing "Little Steve" didn't seem to mind much either.

Two Years

2010-04-14T21:01:00.001-04:00

Two years ago today, we landed in Guatemala....two very tired adults, three extremely excited children, and 27 suitcases containing all of our wordly belongings.

Much of that day is a blur to me, but I do remember lunch at McDonald's (and wondering at the fact that a Happy Meal could cost $20-some dollars...it didn't. It was Quetzales). I also remember finally settling down into bed for the night, and being shocked when said bed began to move across the floor. And then the walls moved. And everything else. When I realized, Floridian that I am, that this MUST be an earthquake, I decided that we'd probably made a mistake and should head back to the States.

The last two years have been full of incredible highs....and incredible lows as well. I think the best way to describe the adventure we've been on is to compare it to marriage and parenting. Some days you love it and can't imagine anything better. And some days, you ask yourself, "What was I THINKING?!" You know there's a bigger picture and you hold onto that even when the daily minutiae seem like they will overwhelm you.

Last night at dinner, each person in the family shared their bests and worsts of the past two years in Guate. Some were funny, some were poignant. But the bottom line was this: we all feel great peace and great fulfillment in living our lives for a purpose and trying to live in a way that reaches beyond our own needs and wants to help other people. That's not meant to sound arrogant in any way. It's just that, on those difficult days, we find comfort in knowing that we're doing exactly what we're supposed to be doing right now.

Lest I make us sound TOO spiritual.....when it was Jackson's turn to share his "worst," it didn't take him long to announce that it was this: "missing shopping at Target." Have to say, I'm right there with you buddy.

I Can't Say it Better Than This

2010-04-03T23:14:00.002-04:00

CS Lewis:
There is a stage in a child's life at which it cannot separate the religious from the merely festal character of Christmas or Easter. I have been told of a very small and very devout boy who was heard murmuring to himself on Easter morning a poem of his own composition which began 'Chocolate eggs and Jesus risen.' This seems to me, for his age, both admirable poetry and admirable piety. But of course the time will soon come when such a child can no longer effortlessly and spontaneously enjoy that unity. He will become able to distinguish the spiritual from the ritual and festal aspect of Easter; chocolate eggs will no longer seem sacramental. And once he has distinguished he must put one or the other first. If he puts the spiritual first he can still taste something of Easter in the chocolate eggs; if he puts the eggs first they will soon be no more than any other sweetmeat. They will have taken on an independent, and therefore a soon withering, life.

Bloom

2010-03-10T12:50:00.004-05:00

We've been terrible bloggers this year, mostly because, to be honest, it has been an overwhelming year so far for the Ottos. We've faced the death of my Grandma, Jackson's surgery, sickness, difficult situations in the lives of some friends and family, and well, just plain life in another country.

Here's how I'd summarize the last few weeks:

1. Grandma. I already wrote about her in my last post, but it always surprises me when I think about her and remember, "She's not here anymore." I'm glad she's happy and strong again....but I'll always be sad that there's one less person like her on this earth. I miss her.

2. Jackson. This boy does not do anything half-way. His surgical experience began with him leaping up onto the gurney, ready to go. Everything went just as smoothly as it could have, for which we are unendingly grateful. It's still a wee bit stressful to have your little guy go under the knife in a Guatemalan hospital. I'm still amazed at the peace we had as we made the decision, though, and the incredible gift God gave us of sending my mom down that very week.

3. Mom. I can't say enough about this. Except maybe I can, because if I start, I'll just end up blubbering. Ah well. We enjoyed almost 3 weeks of relaxing, laughing, talking, watching stupid movies, being tourists, talking, spending hours in the hospital, coffee-drinking, cooking, talking....just doing life together. And this house is way too empty without her.

4. Sickness. Before we moved here, we rarely got sick, rarely went to the doctor, never had a serious medical situation. Since we've lived here, we've experienced an onslaught of illness and injury, and while they've all turned out well, it takes its toll, especially these last few weeks.

5. The, um, interesting way things roll here. Let's just say that we've felt the earth move, literally, underneath us. Nothing, absolutely nothing at all like what people in other places have been through, but very! exciting! especially in the dark. Although the kids think it's quite fun to run outside at 2 a.m. in their pajamas. What's so wrong with that?
Then there are the "usual" challenges like: having the water go out for hours on end, power lines blowing up and blowing out some of our electronics (nothing valuable...thankful for that, too), and even just the general chaos around town as Easter season kicks in.

The bottom line is that, despite the stress and plain craziness of the last couple of months, we are all here, we are all healthy, we're all not only still speaking to each other but still loving each other.
I've actually gotten to see my kids step up and pitch in to help when I was sick. And they've simply blown me away with the gentle, sweet way they've taken care of their brother after his surgery. So, I don't know if I could honestly say that I'm thankful for the difficulties, but I am thankful for the beautiful things that those difficulties reveal, the things that you hope you are planting all along and that, when given the chance, really do bloom.

Grandma

2010-02-03T19:34:00.006-05:00

My grandma passed away this past week. I have felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude when I think about all of the memories of my childhood that involve her. She was a huge part of my growing-up years, and that is precious to me.
She was the type of person who never sought the spotlight, although she could have. She was a very gifted seamstress and baker, and won accolades for both of those things, yet she never bragged about them. She let my grandpa do that for her, which he was more than happy to do.
The part of her legacy that I am most grateful for is the way she valued family. Even as they got older, she and my grandpa would load up their car with goodies for us and make the long drive from Florida to South Carolina to visit. The whole point of their trip seemed to be to shower us with love....and lots of candy. They succeeded.
I was blessed to live near my grandma again a few years ago when we moved back to Florida. I remember trying to take her out to lunch or breakfast, and she would forever insist that she pay for the meal. In fact, the very last time we saw her, in December, she was pretty upset with us when she realized we had paid. We got away with quite the coup there.
I think my daughter Shelby put it best when she looked at a picture of Grandma today and commented, "She doesn't even need her walker anymore. She can run now and not even get tired." Yes she can. And that is the dichotomy. So happy for her that we would never wish her back here, and yet sad for us to be without her love, her quick sense of humor, and her yummy cookies. I love you, Grandma.

What We Do

2010-01-03T00:04:00.007-05:00

Because I tend to be the blogger in the family, and because my main ministry IS to my family, that's what I seem to write about...the day-to-day joys and struggles of life in Guatemala.

But I thought it would be good to blog about some of the other things we've done this year.

When we knew God was calling us here, we also knew that this was something that would need to involve our whole family. We were passionate about the fact that it wouldn't be just a "job" that Steve would go do, but an adventure that would involve each of us. And it has been just that.

The main thing we do here is help bring mission teams to Guatemala, and to host them while they're here. Steve is with the teams from the time they land in Guatemala City until he takes them back to the airport a week later. Well...he does get to come home for some sleep. He's very good at what he does, because he is excited about it, and other people catch his passion. His heart is to take people out of their comfort zones, to show them the need that exists around the world, and to pray that they leave here changed and ready to serve the body of Christ in a new way.

Because I homeschool, our kids are able to join the teams on different days. They've been able to go to the malnutrition center to love on the kids there. They've taken part in VBS outreaches, they've helped build houses, and they've climbed volcanoes. I don't know yet what fruit this will bring in their lives, but I am so thankful that they've gotten a glimpse of a world so different than what they've always known in America.

I've also gotten to join in with some of the activities, and I've gotten to be an assistant in the kitchen, where we cook meals for all of the teams. The best part of this is just chatting with the team members and hearing their stories.

I'd have to say that my favorite parts of ministry this past year were participating in the worship team at church and teaching English classes. I taught a group of 20 students who were very eager to learn English. If they can do this, they can get a much better job, so they were very motivated. And they were just plain fun! We shared a lot of laughs together as they learned new English words and I made many mistakes in Spanish, which they found very amusing!

When I reflect back on 2009, I am reminded how God is so huge, so in control, so purposeful and personal in our lives. He is writing a story that we never could have imagined. He is so loving that He allows us freedom within that story, and yet He will check us and guide us when we would choose a way that would not be for our best. I don't always get it, but I can look back and see His hand all over it. And when I see that, I know that the ending will be better than my wildest dreams.

Our Trip to the Park by Shelby

2009-12-28T17:25:00.004-05:00

Nate has a new bike. He got it for Christmas. It is green.

When we went to the park, he went on the bike hills. Jackson and I love running on the bike hills.

I even made some smoke grenades out of dirt.

We walked Pastor Mike's dogs, saw some horses, went in the woods, and my mom and Miss Nancy went running.

We ate some bread, and I fed a little bit to the dogs.

It was super fun!

Top Ten

2009-12-17T15:17:00.004-05:00

We're back in Guate after an amazing 2 week trip to the States. I could get all mushy and wax poetical about our time there, but I'm pretty sure I'd end up in a fetal position, crying and singing "Auld Lang Syne" if I let myself get the least bit sentimental about it right now. It's just a little too close to Christmas....a Christmas which will be our first one without any family. Aaargh!!! Ok, time to stay in denial and attempt to be humorous. I mean, that's a perfectly healthy way to deal with emotions, right?!

So, may I present my Top Ten List of Things I Loved About Our Trip. In random order, of course:

1. The FOOD!!! Good grief! I'd forgotten how many restaurants I'd forgotten about! Every time we turned a corner, we saw a place at which we used to love to eat. P.F. Changs! Chick-Fil-A! Five Guys! Krispy Kreme! I could've gone into a food coma. However, I restrained myself to just a few trips (Per week. Maybe per day. Whatever.) to Starbucks, and the kids got to eat at their faves. Apparently, they associate all things American with Cracker Barrel, and their dream came true on the last day of our trip.

And lest I forget.....there was some fabulous cooking by our moms as well. Grits. Pecan Pie. Yum.

2. Did I mention Starbucks? Oh, I jest. Combine Starbucks with the joy of walking into a REAL. LIVE. BOOKSTORE and my life is simply complete. This happened, and apparently I was so overwhelmed by the collision of two of my favorite things that I actually walked out without purchasing a book. Never happened before.

3. Running. Now, this was a treat. I guess I should give honorable mention to some of the other runners who joined me, namely my brother Travis, Steve....and Caron and Dad O. who played bodyguards on the bike. I got to run in the damp fall leaves of Virginia (TRUE off-roading!), the oh-so-chilly hills of N.C., and finally, the frigid city of Memphis. This was the site of my third marathon, the St. Jude Memphis Marathon. Amazing what a difference water stations, port-a-potties and NO traffic will make in a race experience! Of course, the finish line being in a stadium of cheering fans, the hot showers available after, and the buffet of pizza and other goodies didn't hurt either. Randy Long, a friend from Mississippi, ran it with me. Here's to next year!

4. Friends. Speaking of Mississippi, another gift on this trip was getting to visit friends along the way. We were so excited to spend a weekend with Randy, Penny, and Ben Long. Ben was an incredible intern with us in Guatemala this summer, and has become a good friend. Randy and I ran the race (and lived to brag about it!), and the Longs invited us into their home and to their church for a Sunday. We also got the chance to hang out with Rachel and Aaron Kelly(missionary friends from Guate who were in the States, too) and her family in Nashville. Rachel and I mostly used the time as an excuse to go to Target and Starbucks TOGETHER! It was a special moment for us, but I'm fairly sure the lady we asked to take our picture at Target just didn't get it.

5. Which leads me to what is undoubtably #1 on Jackson's list....Target. I'm not sure how many times we went here....to stock up on "essentials" of course, but I do know that every time we went, I was concerned at the rate at which my heart was beating. That can't be healthy.

6. Driving. Now, this might sound odd, but we love to travel the road. In Guate, my driving mainly consists of the mile-and-a-halfish trip to Antigua and then the fun of circling round and round the cobblestones looking for a parking spot. Or the take-your-life-in-your hands fun of driving to and from Guatemala City. So, the chance to drive a couple of thousand miles across a few states, take in some gorgeous scenery (loved those leaves!) and jam out to some good music was a journey in itself.

7. People. Maybe it was because we were in the South, but I was amazed at how friendly everybody was. In the Houston airport, the lady in one store was so helpful that I almost hugged her. But then I would've spilled my Starbucks.

8. New Places. This was a weird trip in the sense that both sets of our parents were living in new places. I've always thought of going "home" as flying to Florida, but now very little of our family lives there! My folks are enjoying their lifelong dream of running a B&B outside of Williamsburg, VA, and Steve's parents are semi-retired in NC. It actually was better than I imagined it could be. Both sets of grandparents have acres of land on which the kids could run! and explore! and get completely muddy! and although it was a different "home," it reminded me that it's the people that make it home.

9. Sightseeing. A plus of our parents NOT living in Florida was the chance to see new places. We spent one beautiful, drizzly day meandering through Colonial Williamsburg. We've done the actual Williamsburg experience before, but this time, we just toured William & Mary, poked through a few shops, checked out the fall leaves, and just enjoyed being together. What made it special for me was that both of my brothers were there, and that doesn't happen often. I'm pretty sure my mom was on happiness overload.

There was also a fun day in D.C. at the Smithsonian and a day in Memphis (Beall Street, Elvis, and Barbeque...which I smelled along the race course).

10. O.K. I am still NOT going to get sentimental. At all.

The best part of the trip was family. There's nothing like that love that has been there your whole life.

There's nothing like people who will get up at 2 in the morning, make you coffee, and drive you 3 hours to the airport only to turn around and drive 3 hours back home (thank you Mom and Justin).

There's nothing like people putting up with your ridiculous excitement about the little things you miss about America.

There's nothing like someone making a trip to the laundromat to do your dirty laundry when the washing machine breaks.

There's nothing like sitting around at midnight laughing until you hurt.

There's nothing like being together.

Can't wait until next time.

Ministry

2009-10-29T16:04:00.013-04:00

I recently used the phrase "in full-time ministry" to describe our family.

It felt really weird, because I don't think of us that way at all.

Maybe it's because being a missionary doesn't look at like I imagined it would. All those years of sitting in a pew, watching slideshows of missionaries and their families posing next to people of varying colors of skin, in varying typical garb must have given me a lot of weird expectations.

I guess it's like being a parent. When I first became one, I kept thinking, "But, I don't FEEL like a mom."

I loved that baby more than anything, I worried about him constantly, and I lived for his toothless grins and laughs. But I kept thinking, "I'm not a grown-up. Surely someone is going to show up, smile kindly, tell me there's been some mistake, and take him away."

And then one day, I remember putting on my coat and heading out the door to run an errand. I put my hand in my pocket, and found that it was completely full of cookie crumbs. I pulled out my hand and stared at it, and that was when it hit me. I was a mom.

Being a missionary has been a lot like that. It's not until I'm telling someone new what exactly we do here that I think, oh....we are missionaries. But, when I tell them that, a lot of people seem to immediately put us on a pedestal. The most common thing they say to us, over and over, is, "I could never do that." I tell them that we are not special. We're a normal family (well, sort of!), and God can equip anyone's heart to do what He desires for them to do.

Ministry is not just a church service.

Ministry is not just living in another country.

Ministry is not just a degree from college.

Ministry is not just for the brilliant, the wise, the extremely gifted.

THIS is ministry:

In the Park

2009-09-20T17:30:00.002-04:00

The scene:
Parque Central, in the middle (hence the word, "central") of Antigua, a place to sit on benches, drink coffee, and enjoy the day

The characters:
Steve and Shelby, age 8
Uhhh...that would be Shelby's age. Steve's is undisclosed.

The action:
Steve and Shelby are enjoying some time together before walking our mission team to church. A little boy approaches them and asks if they'd like their shoes shined. This is a very common occurrence in Central Park.

The dialogue:
Steve: "No, gracias."
Young boy: "Por favor."
Steve: "No, gracias."
Young boy: "Por que no??"
Shelby: "Daddy, if this little boy shines our shoes, and we pay him, will he be able to eat today??"

Silence.
Massive amounts of guilt being heaped upon Steve's head.

End of scene: Both Shelby and Steve leave the park with freshly shined shoes.

And a very happy little boy has 10Q in his pocket.

Beginning, Middle, End

2009-08-26T15:15:00.009-04:00

Anyone can begin. That's the easy part.
We begin the school year with fresh, unsmudged notebooks, razor-sharp pencils, a lunchbox that doesn't smell like week-old crusts, a folder with everything neatly tabbed and filed.
But come Christmas break, the lunchbox isn't even used anymore, the pencils are missing all their erasers, and the folder? What folder? A backpack makes an excellent filing system, thank you very much.
We begin an exercise program with a plan, the best shoes to enhance our performance, catchy tunes on our iPod, and intensity in our hearts. A few weeks later, the snooze button is the only thing getting a workout.
We begin marriage fully convinced that OUR marriage will be the best, the most intimate, the one that defies every odd and every statistic. A few years later, we're pretty sure we married the wrong person. It must be their fault we're not happy, not feeling that first-kiss rush.
We begin parenting with great hopes, sure plans that we will never, ever raise our voice at our children, we will spend beautiful afternoons making amazing crafts, we will provide financial security for their every need, we will play boardgames every night after our delicious dinner consisting of every food group, and we will simply be the best parents ever.

Beginnings are easy. It's that tricky middle part that makes us want to quit. The middle of the school year, the long, mind-numbing miles 12-19 of a marathon, the times with our spouse when talking through things feels like too much work and too discouraging, the days of mommyhood when the clock seems surely to have broken.

I don't want to be a person who just survives the middle.
I want to begin and end well.
I don't want to always be pushing ahead to the next milestone and miss what God is doing in my heart, in my family's hearts right now. And even though some days are endless, and some days are glorious, I know that the long days, the hard days are the ones that build my character, that prove what I am made of.

Character is a rather unglamorous word. It certainly doesn't stir great emotion, but when you know someone who has it, and who demonstrates it when you need it most, you realize just how unimaginably beautiful it is.

It's often said that a marathon is a great metaphor for life, and as a wannabe marathoner, I kept thinking about that during my first 26.2-miler. There were so many times I wished that I could JUST STOP MOVING. I wanted to have my finish-line moment already. But isn't that the point? I can't stop moving. And if "just finishing" a marathon is an accomplishment in itself, what does finishing well look like?
I want to know.
And not just in a race.

Phil. 3:13-15, The Message
I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back.
So let's keep focused on that goal, those of us who want everything God has for us. If any of you have something else in mind, something less than total commitment, God will clear your blurred vision—you'll see it yet! Now that we're on the right track, let's stay on it

Same and Different

2009-08-16T17:14:00.008-04:00

Life is life, no matter where you live it. There is a common human experience that makes it possible for us to relate to people who may not even speak the same language we do. In the interest of such experience, I'd like to answer the question most commonly asked of me:
"How do you live in a Third World Country??"
Here's how:
In the States, I went to the grocery store. In Guatemala, I go to the grocery store. The only difference is, I can only buy what I can carry in bags (or boxes) to my car, which is usually parked a couple of blocks away.
Well, there might be another difference. I am getting some lightning-fast math skills since I convert every price I see into dollars by dividing it by 8 in my head. I say "price I see," because often there is no price that I can see, and apparently whatever price the cashier assigns it that day is the final answer.

In the States, we sometimes visited our local farmers' market to buy produce. In Guatemala, I sometimes buy produce at the mercado. The only difference is, I speak Spanish, I try to haggle for a different price, and I have learned to ignore the iguanas, rats, roaches, and other wildlife I may come across.
On the plus side, the produce is so ripe and ready that it tastes exactly like it's supposed to.

In the States, I turned on my stove. In Guatemala, I turn on my gas stove, and if, perchance, it is out of gas, I call my friendly gas people and they bring me a new tank. If you run out of gas in the middle of cooking dinner, there's always cereal.

In the States, I went running. In Guatemala, I run with our IDC running club. The only difference is, in our many (hilly!) miles, we have come across all manner of animals, including snakes, pigs (large, and dead), aggressive bees and dogs. We also get the view of an active volcano puffing nearly every time we run.

In the States, I ran errands. In Guatemala, I run errands. The only difference is, I've learned to use my hand as my turn signal, cobblestoned streets don't even feel bumpy to me anymore, and I'm pretty sure I no longer remember what a stoplight means.

In the States, I swore we'd never own a motorcycle. In Guatemala, we do. Enough said.

In the States, we drove everywhere. In Guatemala, we still rely on our car a lot, but we've also taken advantage of our local transportation system, such as chicken buses, tuk-tuks, and just plain old walking.

In the States, I took my kids to the doctor. In Guatemala, I sometimes don't have to. Amoxicillin is available at our local farmacia, right over the counter. Nifty!

In the States, I used my dishwasher every day, sometimes twice a day. In Guatemala, I wash dishes by hand, in a single sink, and at the risk of sounding arrogant, I am pretty darn fast at it.

In the States, I bought fruit and ate it. I turned on the tap and used the water for cooking and drinking. In Guatemala, the only difference is I clean fruit with a disinfectant, and I use a special filter for all of the water. Because parasites are not our friends.

In the States, we went to church. In Guatemala, we go to church. The difference is.....pretty much nothing. We worship the same God, read the same Bible, have the same love for each other, feel our hearts stirred in the same way.

In the States, we were blessed. And in Guatemala, we still are.

July in Pictures

2009-08-02T12:11:00.014-04:00

July has been our busiest month ever. We've had teams back-to-back, and sometimes two at a time. It's easy to get overwhelmed with the work of either leading teams (Steve) or helping to cook for them (Jess), but one of the coolest parts of what we do here is that our whole family can join in with not just the work, but the fun stuff, too. Here are some of the highlights of our month...

Our family gets to love on kids at the Malnutrition Center.

...or on the pet rabbit there.

I got to run with my friends in Antigua's Las Rosas Half-Marathon, and there was nothing better than seeing my family at the finish line...

One of the teams had lots of kids with them, so we tagged along on a visit to the local coffee finka and a hike up Volcan Pacaya.

We get to be a part of an amazing bilingual body of believers.

Celebrating Communion...

...and Jackson as an angel.

So, although July has been one of the most challenging months we've experienced in our time here, it has had many rewards...new friends, new experiences, lives changed.
On to the fall.....

Redemption

2009-07-20T16:59:00.005-04:00

Lately, I've been frustrated with God because I've been asking Him some questions, and I haven't gotten any answers.
There have been so many times I've heard His voice, known what He wanted, known His plan for me. But not lately.
And so, today, as I was asking Him again my questions, I got my answer.
"You keep asking because you know my answer, and you just don't like it."
Ouch.
Truth.
In my mind, I'd already picked out my desired answer, concocted an amazing scenario in which it would all work out the way I wanted, all the while forgetting that, in fact, I am not God.
I read a quote recently in the book "Unfashionable" by Tullian Tchividjian that described the way I have made decisions in my life:
"To be a wordly person, is, in fact, to be a 'practical' or 'functional' atheist. It's someone who--despite all he professes--lives and makes daily decisions as if God doesn't exist. A practical atheist is a person who comes to conclusions about money, business, worship, entertainment, ministry, education, or whatever else without the directing influence of God and his revealed truth..."

I've been a Christian for years, and I can rattle off a list of things I believe. But in my reality, my life, I don't live this way. I make decisions based upon what I want, not upon the answer I've sought from God.
I forget that God is not capable of doing wrong. That He is the ultimate Redeemer, and that if I would just listen and then, the tricky part, obey, He will work it out.
Not in that cliche, "happily-ever-after" way that I mistakenly believed for years, but in a way that will, as it has so many times in the past,
Blow. My. Mind.
That is the way He redeems. So that He gets all the credit, and I can only stare in disbelief.
He takes my knotted-up mess that I am just so sure can never be made right and beautifully reworks it.
So, I'm gonna take that scary leap, jump that gap between what I see and things unseen.
And choose to believe that He will redeem.
"... stand up and lift up your heads, because your redemption is drawing near." (Luke 21:28)

Soccer & Surf...Pathways Youth Team

2009-07-11T23:30:00.010-04:00

Just finished up a week with Pastor Andrew and the youth from our home church, Pathways. What a whirlwind of a week! What started out as a "let's get the Tourist Police soccer field cleaned up" ended up as a entirely new field, complete with heavy machinery and machetes working side-by-side.

The police were anxiously checking on the progress of the field, especially after they realized they got an upgrade from the "machete special". We got the team on the field with the police for a dedication, sharing the Gospel through a wordless book style soccer ball... and finally... a soccer game!

Next step... need some grass so this field is playable for years to come. Anybody interested in taking this on as a fund-raiser?

The week ended up with a free day, which the team chose to explore a new beach which we had heard rented surf boards and motorcycles. Well, the surf was great, and the ride out to the island by boat was a nice trip through the tallest mangrove trees we'd ever seen! The surf shop turned out to be a thatch hut with 5 short boards to pick from, and the motorcycle rentals turned out to be a restaurant owner's "clutchless" 4-wheeler, but we sure made the most of it! 4-8 foot waves pounded the beach, and we did our best to jump over (or through) them for several hours.

Oh, and on the side the team took several trips to the Malnutrition Center in San Juan, and spent an evening helping feed infants in a clinic in Antigua. Great job!

Corpus Christi

2009-07-05T23:57:00.002-04:00

My kids and I were flat on our back in our yard trying to make out shapes in the clouds when Nate heard some music. We all ran outside to see what all the commotion was about, and we walked right into the middle of a celebration!

Today is Corpus Christi, which means "the body of Christ". When I checked with some of my neighbors to see exactly what was being celebrated, I got several blank stares, a few "we're celebrating the body of Christ" (duh), and a few other unhelpful answers. The official catholic answer is found here, but it is the celebration of the institution of the eucharist (Protestants would call this the "Lord's Supper" or communion).

Anyways, it is celebrated in catholicism world-wide, but here in our neighborhood, special attention is given to yellow banners with symbols of a cup and bread, processionals with floats of the patron saint of our town (Saint Peter), and plenty of fireworks! Nate especially like the mortars which fired percussion shells straight up in the air, just ahead of the processinals.

Click on the picture (above) to see some highlights of the afternoon, as we followed the processional through our tiny "suburb" of Antigua (called Panorama), which ended at the town cathedral with bell-ringing, and a fair with lots of loud music.

Torn

2009-06-14T19:57:00.006-04:00

The last few weeks were full of questions.

We were blessed to catch up with so many friends and family in Florida, and they all had questions as to how life is in Guatemala.

There aren't any simple answers. I think the best way I can put it is that I feel I have a heart torn in two. Not in a bad way, like a broken heart, but a heart that is stretched between two places.

On the one side, our time in Florida felt like we were being bathed in love. When we spoke at our home church and had so many people hug on us, tell us they loved us and prayed for us, press donations into our hands, we felt so supported, so humbled by their care.

When we spent 2 1/2 weeks being spoiled rotten by my mom and dad, so overwhelmed by how they just poured their hearts into letting us rest and renew, we felt so blessed to call them our family.

All of these good things made saying good-bye more painful than it's ever been. It was a reminder of how many people we love that we leave behind for months at a time. It was a reminder of the silly little comforts we miss....grocery stores so shiny, clean and stocked with everything.....speaking English.....Starbucks!......smooth, broad streets. All of these are unimportant, but they sure are nice to have.

And yet, now that we're back in Guatemala, although I wish I could pull up to a Starbucks drive-thru and get my favorite, and although my heart hurts if I think about the very tearful good-bye my children said to their grandparents, there is peace in knowing that this is where God has us.

No, we don't know how long we'll be here. We don't know what is next. But we know that, right now, we are obeying God's plan for our family, and even though that may cost us emotionally, the peace that accompanies that obedience is indescribable.

I've heard from other missionaries that this tearing of the heart is something that you, somehow, learn to live with. This trip to Florida was the time I felt it the most. For all the pain of missing my family, my friends, I knew that I didn't really "belong" there right now. Maybe someday, but not right now.

We shared with our church that missionaries are not "supermen" or "superwomen." They're just ordinary people following God. We've learned this year just how ordinary we are, how being a missionary is not some romantic feat. We've never wanted to glamorize it or be less than honest about it either.

Some days are really, really hard. Sometimes we wonder why we're here.

Some days are amazing. Sometimes we know why we're here.

And when you think about it, we all have torn hearts, longing for those things that we'll only know and share in eternity. No matter where God has led us, we should never really belong. One day, the tear in our hearts will be healed, and how good that will be. Until then, we want to do more than just survive. We want to live a wild adventure following the Spirit, trusting Him to care for those we love, trusting Him to bring the healing and peace we need. And He does.

Beach Days

2009-06-06T19:40:00.003-04:00

My mom and dad rented rooms at a charming B&B on the beach (Beachside Palms), and we had 3 wonderful days of laughing, eating, swimming, eating, running, eating, catching up, reading, napping, eating.....it was great to have the whole Moore family together for the first time in more than 3 years!

The List

2009-05-24T17:53:00.004-04:00

Since we arrived in Florida on Friday, we have begun to check off items on my dad's famous multi-page list of things for us to do while we're here.

Interestingly enough, when Nate read the list, his response was, "It's all about food!"

Well, yes. Yes, it is.

So far: Starbucks, Dad's famous breakfast, Mom's pot roast, the Lighthouse Doughnut Store, Cracker Barrel, Mom's Chex Mix, the pool, and somehow, we even managed to go to church in between all of our eating! It was great to see everyone, to hug and be hugged.

Better go check the list to see what's next.....

On How We are Keeping the Local Hospital in Business...

2009-05-03T20:33:00.002-04:00

Last week it was my turn to go to the hospital. I pride myself on my pain tolerance. I mean, I've had three kids. And a root canal. So, when I felt some intense pain that reminded me of well, nothing I've ever felt before, I woke up my hubby and informed him, quite calmly, that we needed to go to the hospital.

The first sign that things would not be boring was the fact that the hospital was totally, completely dark, and we had to buzz the intercom to get into the also-very-dark waiting area. The mumbling desk clerk gestured in the general direction of the hallway, so we assumed that was where we were to sit.

The fact that the clerk had to call the doctor multiple times to rouse him from his slumber was apparently not enough to send us home.

However, when we both saw the ginormous rat...yes, RAT, hurtling himself down the hallway, we almost gave up. But no. We were committed. And still in pain.

In the interest of good taste, I will not describe the noises that were coming from the patient in the first room. Suffice it to say that he or she must have been visiting the hospital due to intestinal issues. Maybe that's why the rat was running.

Anyway, when the doctor finally woke up, he proceeded to examine me. Now, I always thought that charts, writing down blood pressure, medical history, weight, etc. was kind of important, but I was very, very wrong. I also thought that doctors checked the part of your body that actually HURT, but I have obviously never been to medical school. I'm not sure the doctor has either.

Apparently when your appendix region is in great pain, the correct area to probe is your leg and your toe. Go figure.

I digress. The nurse eventually came in to draw blood and to have me collect a sample in a used baby food jar (hey, it had been washed. I think), and the doctor, upon exiting the room, threw out an afterthought for Steve to answer. This was in Spanish, but I will translate:

Dr.: "She's never had any children, right?"

Steve: "Um. Yes."

Dr: .......silence......

Steve: "Three."

Dr: "But of course they were natural births."

Steve: "Um. No."

Upon which the doctor had to push the nurse aside, to see for himself if this were true. It was.

We eventually did leave the hospital with no real diagnosis, but I was amazed at how quickly I began to feel better at the thought of just going home.

The best part is, we got to visit our friends at the hospital again last night, after Steve decided to see if a saw was indeed able to slice through a nail and a finger. It is.

His hospital visit was much less exciting, although we are learning so much medical information each time we go. For example, did you know that a used water bottle is perfect for pouring some sort of cleaning liquid onto an open wound? And that cotton "pieces" (formerly known as sterile cotton balls or gauze) do not have to be sterile? They can be stored in strips of brown paper bags. Awesome.

We've had some great laughs in our medical adventures, but in all honesty, we have an excellent family doctor here, and we are very thankful for our local hospital. Rats and all.

2009-04-26T15:33:00.005-04:00

Before we moved to Guatemala, I had been a runner, but I'd only done a 5K race and a couple of 10k Turkey Trots. That all changed when I started running with what we affectionately call the "IDC Running Club" (Iglesia Del Camino). There is just nothing like running here...we have experienced puffing volcanoes, attacking bees, dead animals on the road (from huge pigs, to snakes of every size, to a bat, and everything in between), rain, speeding chicken buses, and more.

We have seen the mountains from every angle, in every light, cloud-topped or clear, sun-dappled or hazy. We have passed people walking or riding their bikes to the market, to work, to their villages, and when we see some of those people walking without shoes, it is a reminder of how blessed we are, and how much more there is to do here.

We have pushed our bodies to their limits and experienced the highs of meeting new goals, crossing new finish lines.

But today was the best run I've ever had, because it was the first time Nate and I got to run in his first race together. He'd been asking for months if he could do a race, and today was his day to take part in a 5K in Guatemala City. I can't even express how proud I am of him. He ran his first race in a foreign country, on a course that was fairly hot and hilly, and he was amazing! He didn't complain, and when he started to get worn out and I gave him the good ol' "Mom peptalk," he listened, and then I could hear him telling himself, "I can do this. I can do this."

We sprinted over the finish line together....I hope there are many more finish lines to come.

Oh yeah---and even though the course was mismeasured (happens all the time here!), so that the 3 miles was actually almost 4, he finished the race in 35:54, having only done ONE training run. I'm gonna have to step it up!

Thanks, Nate, for a wonderful day!

Day with Dick

2009-04-15T21:14:00.006-04:00

Nate and I spent the day riding with Dick Rutgers. For all of the time I have spent leading teams in and around the Antigua area, it was very refreshing to spend the day with someone well acquainted with the local villages and the children impacted by severe disabilities and poverty.

Click on the photos to get a closer look. We packed into the front seat of the 4WD and left the valley which surrounds Antigua, and went south and west towards the Pacific Coast. Within minutes we dropped from 5,000 feet to less than 100, and the scenery changed from volcanos to sugar cane fields. We saw miles and miles of the fields, where men earn $10 daily (only 3-4 months during season), working 12 hour shifts in extreme heat and dangerous conditions (threshing machines regularly maim or kill workers). Several fields burned as they were prepared for harvesting.

The villages we passed were crude block or bamboo covered in tin, and the barefoot children ran in the streets. Mosquito nets are a requirement here in rainy season (lasting 6 months), but most cannot afford them. Kitchens are outside (pictured at left towards the bottom center).

We picked up a nurse in a town which has a relationship with the 3 families we visited. In all cases, families of 5-7 children was the norm. Of these, at least one had a severe handicap, and in the cruel world of extreme poverty, they are the first to die. Dick checked on a boy with cerebral palsy, who has spent most of his 7 years in a hammock (upper left) waiting to die. Sponsors in the States have given Dick the opportunity to buy food for him, and while thin, he looks much better than 3 months ago. We visited another family (affected by multiple sclerosis), and Dick looked at report cards and rewarded the kids with a trip to the local fast food restaurant (packing 13 into his 4WD)...we let the kids go on the rides, and Nate played tag with the healthy kids later at their house.

What impacted me about poverty was how "normal" kids are regardless of culture or economics. They want to be held (even by a stranger), played with, and rewarded for being good.

The parents have a resolve to survive, and a peace and simplicity that is hard to put into words. They have nothing, yet invite any stranger into their homes. They love their kids.

Days like today come once in a lifetime, and I got to spend this special day with my son Nate, who impressed me with his love for other kids, and how he hung on every word Dick shared with us.

Life and Death

2009-04-05T20:06:00.002-04:00

I hope I never get numb to seeing hurting people, to seeing pain. It's easy to do, living here, because there is pain, poverty, hurt, need everywhere. I walk down the street with my kids, and I pass so many people sitting with a bowl, begging for money. I see people so drunk that they literally pass out and sleep on the sidewalk. There are homeless people sleeping in the grass. There are children who walk around the town with no shoes on their little feet.
It's easy to get hardened, to get "used" to seeing these sights. But this week brought a reminder again of why we are here. God wants us to bring His good news of healing and hope, restoration and freedom. We can't just "preach" to people without showing them first that God loves them. One way we do this is by meeting their very real physical needs, and one of the biggest ways we've been able to do that this year is through taking teams to the Malnutrition Center. This is a place for children whose parents cannot even feed them properly, or for children who, for one reason or another, simply are not thriving physically.
This has been a beautiful ministry for our family to be involved in. We've all gone there, and Nate and Shelby get so excited to play with the kids, to love on the babies, and just to help in whatever way they can. But this week, while Steve and a team were ministering there, a 7 year-old child named Benito (who weighed only 25 pounds when he was brought in), passed away.
Heartbreaking.
It was devastating for my children, even though they understood that Benito is not hungry anymore, is not in pain, is playing and eating whatever he wants right now.
And it was a powerful reminder that this is why we are here, that this is no game but serious business, helping to save lives both physically and spiritually.
Matthew 19:14-15 But Jesus said, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children.” And he placed his hands on their heads and blessed them before he left.

Planting Seeds

2009-03-23T10:43:00.007-04:00

Mission team season is in full swing here, and since Steve's main job is setting up all the logistics for those teams and then leading them in their projects and outreach events, he is very busy during this time. A cool blessing that comes with this job is the opportunity for our kids to go along on some of the projects. Both Shelby and Nate went with the group to the Malnutrition Center. They absolutely love going, playing with the children there, and loving on the babies, too.

By the end of last week, we were pretty wiped, so we planned a family day for Saturday, just relaxing and being together. The kids bought seed packets and planted a tiny garden in the small piece of ground we call our backyard! They weren't crazy about preparing the soil, but they loved making little holes and putting those tiny seeds in, ever so carefully.

That night at dinner, Jackson was sure his plants had already grown, and he needed to go check on them. The next morning, the kids were out the door before breakfast to water the ground. If excitement and lots of watering can grow a garden, then ours is sure to be amazing!

Helping Paint a House

2009-03-10T08:59:00.005-04:00

For my birthday, I helped paint a house! The people there were: two ladies, one teenage boy, one little boy, and one little girl. There were animals, too. There were: a duck, two BIG roosters,one little rooster, and a hen. I got to hold the little rooster! I got to feed AND water the pets! I also got to play with the little kids!

Allergies

2009-03-02T21:18:00.003-05:00

Here's the latest life lesson from my five year old.

Jackson: "Mom, I think God is allergic to some people."

Wow. This is how I all-too-often live my life, my words declaring that God loves everyone, and my actions saying, "I can fake like I love you, but really? Not. even. close."

I act like there are people who God SHOULD be allergic to. So, this must mean that I can get a pass on loving them, too.

But then I read something like this, which I "stumbled" across yesterday after I was really, really ticked at someone...justifiably of course, and oh yeah, I was righteously angry, of course.

Romans 14:1, 10-12, 22-23 in The Message:

Welcome with open arms fellow believers who don't see things the way you do. And don't jump all over them every time they do or say something you don't agree with—even when it seems that they are strong on opinions but weak in the faith department. Remember, they have their own history to deal with. Treat them gently.

^10-12So where does that leave you when you criticize a brother? And where does that leave you when you condescend to a sister? I'd say it leaves you looking pretty silly—or worse. Eventually, we're all going to end up kneeling side by side in the place of judgment, facing God. Your critical and condescending ways aren't going to improve your position there one bit. Read it for yourself in Scripture:

   "As I live and breathe," God says,
      "every knee will bow before me;
   Every tongue will tell the honest truth
      that I and only I am God."
So tend to your knitting. You've got your hands full just taking care of your own life before God.

^22-23Cultivate your own relationship with God, but don't impose it on others. You're fortunate if your behavior and your belief are coherent. But if you're not sure, if you notice that you are acting in ways inconsistent with what you believe—some days trying to impose your opinions on others, other days just trying to please them—then you know that you're out of line. If the way you live isn't consistent with what you believe, then it's wrong.

...And therein lies the prescription for those pesky allergies.

Snow Days

2009-02-16T16:38:00.002-05:00

What a week in Colorado!

It was a combination of an incredible conference (led by Stasi Eldredge, author of Captivating), breathtaking scenery, and just great fun with my friend Nancy!

Here are the highlights:

1. Getting to know Nancy's family, especially her sweet parents. They adopted me as their granddaughter, and happily enabled my Starbucks addiction! Yes!

2. Speaking of Starbucks, we went 10 times, and that was restraining ourselves. Our first morning, our jog ended at the SuperTarget Starbucks parking lot. What does that say about me?

3. Getting to meet many women at the Captivating Retreat, from all over the country. They were always shocked to hear that we were from Guatemala, and we usually ended up spending the mealtimes answering questions about where we live, what we do, etc. By the last meal, Nancy and I were ready to just say we were from Florida! Seriously, it was cool to see how interested many people were in our lives and our mission here.

4. Snowmobiling....wow, wow, WOW! A combination of high speed, deep snow, COLD wind, the most beautiful mountains and forests I've ever seen, and no bathrooms. Enough said.

5. Shopping at Target for the first time in 7 months. I seriously felt like I was having heart palpitations. Of course, it could have been the Starbucks espresso truffle drink in my hand.

6. Did I mention the beautiful mountains all around us? I don't think I could ever tire of staring at them.

7. The chance to just get away, not have to do the daily chores, and really sit and listen to God. I don't make enough time for that in my life.

8. Worshipping with a group of women. We don't get that often here, and it was beautiful to see and experience.

9. Speaking only English for a whole week!

10. And then, coming home to lots of hugs and love and appreciation....and a beautifully clean house! The best ending to an amazing trip.

Council Meeting

2009-02-02T22:24:00.004-05:00

We've had an amazing year watching the church shift from a "rebuilding" mode to hitting its stride.

In November and December, we had our first membership meetings, and explained the purpose for signing a church covenant. Over 50 people to date have chosen to sign the covenant and become church members.

This year started with our first Leadership Council (similar in concept to an Elder Board in many churches). Two weeks ago, six men were challenged with the responsibility of providing counsel and advice to our pastor and senior church staff. Yesterday, five accepted the challenge, and the sixth is continuing to pray and consider if this something he should do.

As Pastor Mike asked each man about their decision, I was awestruck to hear each one share how God had been drawing them out of the crowd, and each (in their own way) soberly accepted God's tap on their shoulder to grow closer to Him.

Pastor Mike summed up some of the other details of the last year (including the move into our new building) and included some great pictures in his latest post...

Thank you for your prayers... there is a lot of work in the year ahead. Please pray that we will be able to train new believers and continue to build relationships with each person so they can grow stronger in their faith!

Grillin' Guatemala-Style

2009-01-23T13:39:00.003-05:00

We've lived in Guatemala for 9 months now, but it is not easy to think of yourselves as "at home" in a very different place when the entire fabric of your lives has been woven in America. Strangely, it's the little things that start to make us realize, "O.K., this is home now." Here's one of those things: we bought a grill.

Propane? Who needs it!

Lighter fluid? Pshaw!

Blow dryer? Check!

And the amazing part is, in Florida, we used to cook year-round on our pretty decent propane grill. The kids never even knew it existed or cared. But when we brought out our new little cooker last night, it became a family affair. Everyone wanted to help, and everyone was spellbound by the fire! Even more amazing, those burgers were the best we'd ever made!

For all the challenges of living in a foreign country, I know that all along the way there are priceless gifts like these, moments where I realize that my family is learning to really appreciate what we've always taken for granted, to enjoy time spent together, to get really, really excited about the flavor of a burger cooked over some coals and a blow-dryer.

Thank you, Lord for the simple things.

Things I Learned on My Mexican Adventure

2009-01-10T14:40:00.003-05:00

Every 90 days, we have to get our passports stamped. Every 6 months we're required to leave the country to maintain our tourist visas. On Wednesday, we took a trip to Mexico for that purpose. Here is the tale of our journey (ha..that sounds so deceivingly routine).

1. Don't travel with a child who has been sick in the last, oh, week or so. Jackson had an intestinal illness earlier in the week (that is an extremely polite way of saying that there was stuff coming out of him that should not have been). We truly thought he was over it. Wrong. Just as we crossed the border into Mexico, he got sick. All over his bus seat, his clothes. Me.

2. Bus "bathrooms" are fun. Imagine an airplane bathroom on crack. On the plus side, you get to really strengthen your muscles as you try to maintain your balance and not bang into the walls. You also learn rather quickly NOT to open the window, no matter how foul the smell is in there, because passersby on the highway do NOT want to see you in there. And bring your own tp.

3. The Mexican taxi-drivers were extremely helpful. Seriously. Not only did our driver take us directly from the bus station to the hospital (this was after Jackson became sick AT the bus station, and I tried in vain to direct people around the pile on the floor), he brought all 5 of us and our luggage inside and told the doctor what we needed.

4. Contrary to popular belief, needles for shots do NOT have to be sanitary. They can be dropped on the floor right in front of you and still be used! Cool! Also, anti-vomiting shots do not always work.

5. Being in a hotel room in a border town in Mexico with a still-sick child really pumps up your prayer life.

6. Relaxing at the hotel pool is pretty fabulous.

7. It's always good to make sure the room service people actually swipe your card before they tell you it's not working, causing you to spend $20 on an international phonecall to your bank only to find out the charge was never even attempted. Whew.

8. It's not that fun to lose your return bus ticket. It IS pretty fun when the driver tells you not to worry about it.

9. Make sure you get your passport stamped at the right border when crossing back in. It would pretty much cause you to wail and gnash your teeth to forget that.

All humor aside, we came back from our trip with very thankful hearts. Over and over, we saw how God protected and provided for us. From being able to exchange money right at the border (money we'd need as soon as we got to Mexico, for the hospital), to being allowed on the bus with no ticket and no pesos left in our possession to purchase a new one, to not missing the passport stamping at the border, to our only debit card working (our other one got messed up the day before we left home), to the people in Mexico being very warm and friendly, and most of all, to our precious Jackson being healed and well again. We were amazed how God provided the clinic with a very good doctor. As I sat by my very sick boy and prayed for him, asking God to wake others to pray for us, He answered, and my mom (who had no idea what was going on) woke up several times that night praying for us. He also showed His care for us in a real way when I stood at the bus station, scared for Jack, tears rolling down my face, and a sweet lady came and felt his forehead, comforted me and told us where the hospital was.

God is so good, and we praise Him.

And this is one adventure we won't soon forget!

My Christmas Eve Miracle

2009-01-05T20:33:00.003-05:00

It might not seem like a big deal, and I think I even tried to talk myself into believing that. So what if I didn't have a piano? I have always been grateful that my parents did everything to make sure I had one ever since I was about 6. I had owned several variations on pianos...old, older, scratched keys, gently used, etc., but I had never owned a brand-new piano until my hubby bought one for me our second year of marriage.

I loved that Yamaha. It was electronic, but felt and sounded just like the real deal, and best of all, it never needed tuning.

It moved from Air Force base to Air Force base, to cold New York, and even lost a leg on its way to Florida, but it was a part of every home we made together for almost 14 years. I taught several children to play on that keyboard, including my own, and I knew I'd have to part with it when we left for Guatemala.

I was sad to say good-bye, but thrilled that it was going to be owned by a student of mine who loved to play and would treasure it. When we got to Guatemala, a piano had to take low priority on the list of things to purchase. When you're furnishing an entire house...and by that, I mean the oven, the refrigerator, everything.....a piano is definitely a luxury.

So, we admired a lovely keyboard or two from afar, but never were serious.

Until Christmas Eve, when my friend Nancy forwarded me an email that a missionary needed to sell an almost-new piano.

That just so happened to be the same kind I'd seen in the city.

Except nicer.

And less than half-price.

Oh, and did I mention that some generous people we don't even know well picked that exact day to deposit money in our account, money that added to donations from the day before covered the cost?

Steve didn't even blink. He and my dad jumped in the car (while Mom, Mel and I were busy making Christmas Eve dinner and getting ready for church). He had to go to 5 (yes, 5!!) ATMs to get the cash (everything is done in cash here...even our rent) to get out the money, and he had to beat anyone else who wanted the piano (is that a good missionary thing to wish for?!)

Well, he did , and I spent part of Christmas Eve playing carols on my new piano. An added gift is the fact that my kids love it and are excited to "relearn" how to play.

The best part of all was feeling loved and cared for by a personal Father who gave me a gift He knew would mean something so precious to me. I feel very treasured and humbled by His love. Thank You for my gift.

Goodbyes

2008-12-26T14:34:00.006-05:00

I don't do well with this good-bye thing. We have looked forward so much to our family visiting, and it seemed like each day they were here, time kept picking up speed like a rock rolling down a hill. I kept wanting to just stop everything from moving, freeze the moment, and not let it pass.

The amazing thing is that nine people could share a house and a car and a tiny kitchen together for 10 days and get along. Actually, we more than got along. We laughed, hung out, ate, cooked, danced, napped, ate some more, played with the new Christmas toys, went sightseeing, kept track of everyone's water-drinking, ate some more, watched YouTube, and just loved being together.

That is probably the thing I appreciate most about my family. We're far from perfect and are just as dysfunctional as any family, but I love that we can really hang out with no pressure to do anything, no hurt feelings if some people want to go out and some want to stay home. Steve and I kept saying, "They are so easy!"

I loved getting to know Melissa better, too. She fits right into our family and is a blast to have around. She and Justin are a great fit together, and she adds so much to our family.

At some point, I'll write about all we did, but right now, my heart is too full. I have cried a lot this morning, especially when we came back from the airport and walked back into a very still, much t00 quiet house.

Mom and Dad, Justin and Mel, thank you for coming and for making this Christmas so special for us, for being right at home with us, for never complaining about the challenges of being here. We love you and miss you.

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas....

2008-12-08T15:56:00.005-05:00

Thanksgiving - Guatemalan Style

2008-11-30T22:41:00.007-05:00

We had a GREAT opportunity this week to celebrate Thanksgiving with our neighbors. One advantage of living away from the States is it forced us to dig a little deeper and reach out a little farther than we would have otherwise.

Do Guatemalans celebrate Thanksgiving? Nope.

Did that stop us from joining in with all of our local neighbors? No way!

Our kids gave a "presentation" of the history of Thanksgiving, which some of their friends translated into Spanish for our guests. After hearing how Squanto the Indian helped the Pilgrims to survive in their new land, we appreciated even more what our neighbors had all done at one time or another to help us get the hang of living here in Guatemala. From the doctor next door that helped curb our panic with our first sick kid, to our landlady who helped us work out our several-month-long telephone and internet hookup issues.

We ended up with families from four different countries (USA, Guatemala, Columbia, and El Salvador), and it was an opportunity to get past the daily "hola" and "what a beautiful day" ruts that are so easy to get stuck in, especially with another language.

We got to watch the neighbor kids make funny faces as they tried American food, and we laughed with their parents as we told them about our kids first times eating the local food too. We talked about everything from blueberries to southern accents, and colonial Williamsburg to Bogota Columbia.

We are so blessed!

Adventure with Nate

2008-11-25T21:43:00.010-05:00

I took Nate out about 15 minutes south of our home to a dry riverbed at the base of Volcan Fuego. It's still an active volcano, and in the pics, you can see some of the plumes of smoke coming out of the top.

The riverbed was littered with volcanic rock, pumice, and the view of the mountains overhead was magnificent!

Nate is also showing off two different colored volcanic rocks, which varied from black, to various shades of grey, to reddish hues.

Nearby was bedrock which had been worn smooth by the river, and Nate is sitting at the top of a waterfall. On the way back into town, the sun was setting, and just lit up the patch-work of farmlands on some of the nearby hills.

Just a beautiful day to explore, spend with my son, and to enjoy the beauty of clear skies now that dry season has begun!

Sad Goodbye

2008-11-24T22:48:00.012-05:00

Today we took a team of 20 youth (from our home church, Pathways) to the Malnutrition Center. It's located about an hour north of Antigua, has between 35 and 40 children under the age of eight, and has attracted our attention because it has become neglected in recent years because of its out-of-the-way location.

As several of us were working with the children, the director of the clinic came in and invited me to meet a family that was admitting their daughter. As I entered the room, I saw a mother crying for her two year old child as she said her goodbyes. One of the assistants came in a minute later to take the child to what would be her new home for the next five or six years. I stood there awkwardly as the director asked a few questions from the family in order to update their records. It went something like this....

- How many children do you have? Five.
- One of them is already here, correct? Yes.
- So, you will now have three children at home and two here? Yes.
- Are there any illnesses? For the father, one kidney does not function, and he was admitted to the hospital last week to have his lung drained of fluid. (On his arm was also a very large growth of some kind).
- Actually, how about the child you are admitting? For the child, just a cough.
- Only a cough? Any stomach problems? Yes, she also has frequent diarrhea.
- Are you pregnant? Yes.
- You're pregnant? Yes, (embarrassed glances at each other)... and four months along.
- So this will be your sixth child? Yes.
- Are you breastfeeding any longer? No.
- So, what are you giving the child to drink...milk? No, she doesn't like milk.
- Ok then, some kind of nutritional drink? No, just coffee.
- Coffee? That's all she drinks? Yes, we can't afford nutritional drinks and she won't drink regular milk.
- Ok, tell me about your home...how many rooms, etc? Two rooms, no kitchen, no electricity.
- What type of work do you do? Laborer in a coffee plantation.
- How much do you earn to support your family? Q25 each day (about $3 daily).
- Only Q25 ($3) each day to support a family of eight? Yes.
- How old are you? 35, and my wife is also the same age.

After the questions, the director politely dismissed the couple. As they walked away, the wife patiently waited while the man hobbled with great effort next to her. I stood in stunned silence for a while. Here was a couple my age, looking twenty to thirty years older as the years of hard labor, poor nutrition, and no hope had etched their faces and wrecked their bodies. The child they left behind weighed half of what she should have for her age.

I asked the director if this was typical, and she said yes, since this is such a poor village. An entire village in this same condition is too much to digest, too much to take in. What's harder to grasp is that the pain of poverty and hunger is only a faint shadow of the spiritual darkness and emptiness that is the root of all of this. Where does one begin to help?

Two Weeks in Pictures

2008-11-20T19:05:00.010-05:00

We had a special 2 weeks having family here. On their second day here, we had a 5th birthday party for Jackson. Jack likes to combine the words "fiesta" and "pinata" and just call it a "piesta!"

We took them shopping at our Publix, the market...

We celebrated Christmas early...

We celebrated 12 baptisms...

We experienced a Mayan village...

The boys got to experience the zipline at Finka Filadelphia...

We visited the Malnutrition Center and loved on the kids there...

It was a great reminder that family is special, that I am thankful for people who have known us for years, who know our history, our faults and triumphs and who love us just because. Thank you for coming, Mom and Dad O.!

Family Days

2008-11-13T16:12:00.005-05:00

Steve's parents are here for 2 weeks, and we're having fun taking a break from the routine and spending time as a family. On Sunday, Nancy, Manolo, Nan and I ran in a 10K in Antigua. Near the finish line, Steve and the kids "ran me in" like they did in the marathon. Our local race website, runguate.com, got some great shots of the fam!

How Many Words is a Picture Worth?

2008-10-28T00:21:00.004-04:00

Nate and Shelby loving on some children at a Malnutrition Center.

At the Doctor

2008-10-22T16:34:00.003-04:00

Hi. It's Shelby here. Yesterday Bubby and I went to the doctor. At the doctor I sat down and was quiet while Bubby was( well, loud). Then it was time for my checkup while Bubby played. When it was his turn he said to the doctor,"is this going to hurt"? Then( before the doctor) we went to the Epicure. In the car Bubby and I played with Nate, Bub's crab, and Jack,Bub's lepord( these are toys, so you know). It's October 22 today, so you know. Well, that's it. By!

Because I Needed a Challenge

2008-10-15T16:52:00.008-04:00

There aren't enough challenges here, so I thought I'd artificially create one. Let's see, one part pushing my body to its limits, one part running up massive hills, add 2 parts being chased by chicken buses, oh, and one part high altitude. Add a sprinkle of "the race people just ran out of water," and a big scoop of running hard with your friends and what do you get? The Maya Marathon.

Slice of Life

2008-10-02T08:52:00.004-04:00

Last week, our Leadership Council from our home church, Pathways Community in Largo, FL, was here for a visit, and I got the chance to hang out with the ladies in the group.
We went to a small village near another small village called San Antonio de Agua Calientes, and we were welcomed into the home of a lady named Victoria. She described to us how she saw a need in her town for the women to be able to earn some money for their families. They were weaving beautiful textiles, but other people were buying them and taking them to the Mercado (market) in Antigua, and the women weren't making much profit.
So, Victoria started a co-op. Each lady had to contribute a piece of aluminum, and together, these pieces formed a roof for a small shelter. On this dirt floor, every day, the group sits and weaves. This is their tradition.
Victoria described their daily life to us, from grinding rice into milk for a drink called Horchata, to how they balance baskets on their heads so they can carry a lunch into the field for their husbands, to the weaving process, to cooking tortillas.
She taught us about their Mayan traditions, and we acted out a Mayan wedding ceremony (I was the groom!). Then, we all made our own tortillas on their small stove, and sat down to a Guatemalan lunch that had taken these ladies hours to prepare for us.
As I listened to the descriptions and ate the amazing food, I felt so humbled. These ladies were kind, generous, and treated us as honored guests. They answered all of our questions, were so loving and hospitable. I felt shallow for my grumbling about my small kitchen and lack of dishwasher when I saw their tiny shack of a kitchen.
I need these reminders more often. It is like jumping into a vat of cold water. I wake up to what's real and true, and the pieces of my life shift back into the proper places.

Guatemala's Independence Day

2008-09-17T12:36:00.008-04:00

Here are some shots of the festivities in Parque Central. The fireworks mainly consisted of VERY loud booms...they're pretty much like bombs going off. You can see by Shelby's face that she wasn't too crazy about the noise, but the parades were fun, and the ice cream cones were the perfect way to top things off. (We've decided that ice cream is the Otto family way to celebrate any holiday!)

A Day at the Malnutrition Center

2008-09-09T20:24:00.004-04:00

By Shelby

Hi there. I want to tell you I had a day at the Malnutrition Center.
And some of these babies have bad bug bites. I really want to help them. They are so cute and kind, and the boys and girls there too are kind and they are nice.

They are friendly and they also got to play with us on the playground.
And I was having a great time there. I think they need more food and water.

By Nate

I had a great day there. I really wish I could go again. We played dodgeball and soccer. We really had a great time.

Some kids needed medicine and stuff. When I walked in the baby room, I found out that they needed lots of care and they looked sad. I played with them. I held two.

I really want to head back again.

The View from Here

2008-09-06T17:07:00.003-04:00

Steve and I spent some time last night watching some of the convention speeches on the internet. It was a surreal experience.

I have never watched a convention from another country.
I have never been so interested in a speech that I would watch it twice.
I have never been so thankful to be an American citizen.

I think the emotions rose up in my heart because our conventions are so uniquely American. The flags, the patriotism, the hope and pride, the fact that we, unlike so many places, get to choose our leader. We are not made to vote. We are not coerced or threatened into voting for a particular candidate. We vote, and it counts.

I remember the excitement I felt when I finally got to vote in my first election. I lost that feeling for awhile, but after these last few days, that thrill is back.

I am thankful for the country I live in, the place God has called our family. But every time I have boarded a plane this last year, I have realized what a gift that blue passport is, how many people dream of the day they can have one, and how I don't want to take it for granted.

God has brought us to a new country, and He has proven that He can tenderly change my heart to feel contentment and even happiness in a new and very different place. He keeps drawing us to relationships, to meeting people that we already have grown to love. But, when I send that absentee ballot in this year, I will not think of it the same again. God bless America, and God bless us all.

A Tale of One Tree

2008-08-27T15:22:00.004-04:00

**This is to be sung to the tune of "The Beverly Hillbillies." Oh yes. All together now.

Come and listen to my story of a boy named Nate,

He loved climbing trees, he was feelin' pretty great.

And then one day, he was up high all alone,

He took a little dive and did somethin' to his bone...

Broke, that is.

Fractured.

Guatemala style.

Well, the first thing ya know to the hospital he goes.

He got checked out from his head down to his toes.

Everything was fine, except his elbow's broke...

So the lesson in this tale is to go cut down that rope....

Swing, that is.

Hangin' there, from the tree.

It won't come back now, ya hear??

The end **Actually, there's no chance of the rope coming down. Nate's already trying to get back on it!**

My Veggie Tale

2008-08-20T08:09:00.003-04:00

I liked the veggies. And the fruit.
Apparently, it was not mutual.
Yesterday, I was officially diagnosed (I will spare you the details, but said diagnosis involves traipsing down the street with your sample in a baggie and delivering the lovely baggie to the lab). Anway, I was officially diagnosed with parasites. This is super-common here and most people get it at one time or another, but the strain I have is a particularly, uh, tenacious one.

So, after googling all the words on my completely-in-Spanish-lab-report, we figured out what it was, and my sweet hubby picked up some super-fun medicine for me to take. The list of side effects were quite exciting, and quite accurate. One of the web sites had described that you might have a "metallic taste" in your mouth.
Oh yeah.
I woke up in the middle of the night feeling like I was chewing on a wad of tin foil. Yum.

Actually, I am thankful that we figured out why I was sick, and that there's a fix for it.
In the meantime, those veggies can rest easy for awhile.

2008-08-16T08:50:00.011-04:00

The missions team that was here this week did a street evangelism event for the children of Santa Maria de Jesus (a village nearby with mostly indigenous, Mayan descent. They typically have very little exposure outside of their village - even though it is only a 20 minute drive outside of Antigua).

The activities involved a Gospel Magic show, a pinata, face painting, and crafts. Nate and Shelby manned the chalk station!

The forecast calls for clouds...

2008-08-02T16:22:00.053-04:00

I went for a run this week, taking the route I've really begun to enjoy.

It starts out from our house, across the congested street where horns from the buses notify potential passengers on the upcoming block that their ride has arrived. Motorcycles, mopeds, and cars zip by. Another bus revs its engines as it drops off passengers, who hold their noses as black clouds of diesel fumes envelope them.

I find my break in the traffic and head one block down to the 1/4 mile dirt road that leads to my destination. People weave their way through the mud puddles on foot and on bicycle, and then wait patiently by the side as cars slosh their way past them. A tired and somber woman passes by with a wheelbarrow overloaded with produce, followed by a man who stumbles pastme with drooped shoulders and sunken eyes. As I jog, my focus is just in front of my feet to ensure my next step is a dry one, and I am shaded by bordering trees that prevent the sun from relieving the road's soaked condition and block my view of my goal ahead.

The road finally turns left and narrows to a one-lane bridge. My destination is close - the triangular yield sign for the highway is visible only fifty feet beyond the bridge. A dog races across the road, scavenging for scraps of food as I approach the "River of Life".

The river gets this nickname from the amazing assortment of bacterial, amoebaic, and parasitic organisms that thrive in the open sewer-like conditions of the water. Ironically, men work hard in their bare feet to separate "clean" sand from the polluted waters so that it can be hauled away as fill dirt.

I press ahead, only the fifty foot stretch of steep incline beyond the bridge blocks the view that awaits.

Once again, the view is worth it. (The picture is actually 4 stitched together to attempt to give a feel for what the eyes take in Click on this or any of the other pictures for a MUCH more detailed view).

I turn my head to the left and the view extends even further. And past this is the road I just travelled. A man rides his bike towards the polluted river, weary workers, scavenging dogs, mud puddles, choking diesel fumes, and angry traffic.

The view is even more special because only in the last few weeks has the rainy weather cleared consistently in the mornings to reveal the mountains that surround our volcano valley. Waking up to bleak, grey skies each morning for several weeks creates a hunger and enjoyment of the pristine views.

What's obvious, but still interesting, is that the objects that make up the view haven't changed. Only my position in relation to obstacles (trees, hills, houses, clouds), and the direction of my focus. Fifty feet in any direction and the view of one or more of these four main peaks is blocked by trees. The mountains are still there, momentarily hidden from my view. They haven't changed, only the things around them or the focus of my attention.

I find myself at times living my life looking at my feet, exerting all of my effort to avoid the next obstacle in front of me or trying to let go of my frustration of the distraction of the moment. During the most serious of times, these moments can turn into days or weeks of focusing on all of the things that invade my personal space and comfort. But, the God Who created me never changes, never goes away, and never disappears. He doesn't play tricks on me or smirk while I stand in the muddy street in bewilderment and frustration, wondering where He has gone. He wants me to believe that He is. He never stops existing just because my mind is to tired or distracted to think about Him. He wants me to believe that He is always with me, and that I can walk with my head high and in the fullest potential of His power because I never take the eyes of my heart off the goal, even if my senses can't see, smell, taste, touch, or hear it at the moment.

Eph 1: 17-23 says:
"I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way." (NIV)

Lord, continue to open my eyes of my heart, that I may truly see all that you have made available to me through Jesus Christ. Tear down my petty unbelief, fear of the unkown, and my obsession with minimizing my discomfort and insisting on only working where there is beautiful scenery to enjoy. When my view of You and Your plan is obscured or blocked, may my faith in Your unseen position and power grow to replace what my senses cannot perceive. Would You find enjoyment with me each day as I walk in faith, spilling over in the fullness of the One Who fills everything, everywhere, and in every way. Amen.

Prayer Request

2008-07-28T17:11:00.003-04:00

Several weeks ago (in fact, it must have been not long after we moved here), I was lamenting the fact that I'd miss the big Beth Moore simulcast that's being broadcast to many, many churches across the US. I had the blessing of being able to go to two of her Living Proof Live events, and they were amazing, unbelievable, you pick any superlative and it fits!
Well, on a whim, I decided to email LifeWay and ask if there was a chance we could view the simulcast in Guatemala. I mentioned that, in our little community of missionaries, so many of us had done Beth Moore's Bible studies and had our faith stretched, changed and built up by her teaching.
I'd forgotten about the email after I sent it (oh me of little faith), and then, a few weeks ago, I received the most incredible email from the staff at LifeWay saying that they were not only willing to get us the simulcast, but they would do it for free! Wow.
So, I am just asking everyone who reads this to pray for several things, if you feel led:
1. That the technology will work well on that day. The power goes out frequently here (and for long periods of time), so please pray specifically against that happening.
2. In our little church community, several serious health issues have occurred this week. Please pray for protection and health for all who need to be there.
3. Release of the Spirit to do a mighty work.
4. That seekers will come...maybe those who see the notice at the cafe and are just curious, or even people wandering down the street.
5. Pray for miracles and real, true life-change to occur.
Thank you all for praying!!

Our Little Documentary

2008-07-23T08:35:00.006-04:00

I don't usually recommend stuff on YouTube, but I have to make an exception here. Steve filmed the kiddos giving a tour of Antigua Guatemala, and we posted it on YouTube. It was made for a VBS at the church we were part of in New York, and it turned out great! Here's the link to watch it. (Just a helpful tip: Right under the video, you can click on "high quality" to get a better view). Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kg3tExQThKI

Hurricane Tips

2008-07-19T22:26:00.002-04:00

In the interest of public service, we bring this late-breaking bulletin.
Last week, Mike Moore presented Shelby Otto with a Hurricane Tracking Map complete with Hurricane Preparedness Tips. Upon receiving said map, Shelby Otto took one look at it and said, "Oh, I know what to do in a hurricane."
Jessica Otto asked, "You do?? What?"
To which Shelby replied, "You run around and panic and scream."

After he recovered from his hysterical laughing, Mike Moore commented, "And that happens to be true for half the state of Florida."

Now you know. Another helpful blog from the Otto family. You're welcome.

"Target Always Bees Open"

2008-07-16T13:56:00.003-04:00

Those are the profound, heart-felt words of a four year old who has been Target-deprived for 3 months. I mean, what kind of mother am I??
Actually, his mother has been Target-deprived. Not to mention Starbucks-deprived.
But all that changed as of July 3. We landed in Ft. Lauderdale, and my heroic dad loaded us up and drove us more than 4 hours to my parents' house.
For the next week and a half, they proceeded to spoil us rotten. I mean, only if you count eating cotton candy and pop tarts for breakfast (the kids, not me, I had Starbucks), my not doing a single dish or cooking a meal, swimming at the pool, eating my mom's yummy food and my dad's famous biscuits, etc. as spoiling.
Not to mention that we got to visit friends, see everyone at church and stock up on a very extensive list of supplies!
The kids did amazingly well on their achievement tests (I was so proud of them), and they handled the vaccinations like pros, too.
The only downside was saying good-bye. It was really much harder this time, because we don't know when we'll be back. I'm just going to stay in denial about that.
Anyways, at the end of our little vacation, we had a handsome, sweet, LONELY Steve O. waiting for us at the airport. The way the kids screamed, "DADDY!" and hurled themselves into his arms made me bawl. It is so good to be back together and know that this is where we belong. For all the sweet family and friends we miss so much, and for all the fun things we got to do, we know this is where God wants our family, and there is such peace in that. Only He could do that in our hearts.
In the meantime, thank you to all the people who loved on us and encouraged us while we were there. We love you right back.

14 Years

2008-06-28T16:45:00.003-04:00

To celebrate our anniversary (14th...yeah!!), we went to a local coffee farm called Finka Filadelfia. Now, we could have strolled peacefully through the tour of how the coffee is grown, harvested and roasted, OR we could do this....

A date in antigua and home

2008-06-22T10:34:00.004-04:00

Our date was great! Dad and I went to pollo combaro, the pet store, and,the market. It's so fun! Well, let's hear about our neaghborhood dogs. Fritz is a boy, Coco is a boy, Shadow is a boy, and, Mita is a girl. Jack is 4, I am 7 & Nate is 9. Do you have a pet & what kind is it? See you next time!

WHO is bigger than the boogie man??

2008-06-18T22:56:00.004-04:00

We're sort-of a family of four this week. Nate got to go to an MK camp in the mountains. I'd like to say that he was pretty broken up over leaving us for 6 days, but not so much. I think he was a tad excited to go, seeing as he reminded me SEVERAL times a day the week beforehand that I needed to start packing for him. I'm not sure why I sent him with clean clothes and clean underwear, because I'm pretty sure they will come back untouched by human hands. Ah, camp life.

Anyway, the younger kiddos have enjoyed hanging together this week, and decided to sleep in the same room while Nate was away. This is the conversation we had two nights ago:

Shelby: "There could be monsters. Yeah, they might try to get us."

Jackson: "Monsters."

Shelby: "Don't worry. We have the dogs. We have Fritz, Mita, and Shadow. They will protect us."

Here is where the mom stepped in to provide the tender moment, to bring it all back to the proper spiritual conclusion (insert soft music here).

Me: "And WHO (hint, hint) will protect you most of all?"

Jackson: (Not missing a beat, and with great emphasis) "Pastor Mike!"

Oh well.

I sure wasted a lot of money on those VeggieTales videos.

Teams

2008-06-14T10:19:00.011-04:00

This weekend marks the end of our 2nd month in Antigua, and was puncuated by the departure of our 2nd team that we've had the privilege to work with this year.

First, a little background on the project which several teams will be involved in this summer. As a result of a truly God-given relationship with the local Tourist Police division (through Pastor Mike's and IDC team's leadership of the twice-weekly Bible studies and English classes), men and women are coming to know Christ and develop a deeper walk with Him. The outreach section of Pastor Mike's BLOG details some of the relationships developed with individual officers and their families.

One of the obvious needs that has surfaced is the living conditions of the Tourist Police while they are on duty. Officers typically live several hours outside of Antigua, and serve 8-day straight / 24 hour shifts in a dormitory environment. The facility they live in is in the ruins of a hotel which was leveled by an earthquake in the 1970's. Little has been done to make the ruins suitable for living conditions, and the pictures to the left only scratch the surface of what our brothers and sisters in Christ live with while on duty.

The most urgent need is the bath and shower facilities, and new plans had been drafted and approved earlier this year with the local authorities. As we approached the week of the first team's arrival, we didn't have a clue on how some of the major clearing/leveling and digging for the cesspool would be done to prepare the site for the first team's arrival. Mike received an unexpected phone call that a large John Deere backhoe was sitting on the property and awaiting our arrival to direct the clearing. This marked an unprecedented involvement with the Tourism Council in Antigua, which realized the urgency and benefit to their police, and arranged the machinery and manpower to get this done!

Team #1 - Pathways Community Church, Largo, Florida.

Last week we experienced a lot of rain and a several other unexpected challenges on the project. However, the foundation and underground plumbing were completed, and the team had plenty of much-needed construction experience to overcome some of the hurdles. It was great to see familiar faces from our home church!

Team #2 New Hope Baptist, Cape Coral, Florida

This week we had a youth group with a lot of enthusiasm and a great "can-do" attitude. Half of the team worked with the Hermano Pedro orphanage each day, and the other half continued work on the Tourist Police Bath House. The basic metal frame and corrugated roofing were completed, and it was so encouraging to watch how well this group of teens worked together!

The IDC staff will continue work on the in-wall plumbing in the upcoming week.

Fun days

2008-06-06T10:48:00.007-04:00

I found a stink bug! Well, the stink bug was awsome and colorful! I want to buy a toy that's $2.50! It 's a egg! Well, maybe Jack want's to say something! He say's "Hiiiiiiii"! Well, let's get back to me. I think you might want to hear about the dogs. There's four. Coco, Fritz, Mita, and Shadow. Oh, Jack now say's"Hola" & "como estas"? Well, I would say "Bien y tu"? Now,see you next time! Wate! wat about the picture? It's of the stink bug!

Rainy Days

2008-06-06T09:11:00.005-04:00

Apparently, a tropical situation of some kind has been sitting on top of us, so we have had rain, rain, rain for several days. It cracks me up when people feel obligated to say, "Well, we sure need it, " but, I ask you, who really NEEDS downpours for three days, overflowing streets, and mudslides, cold wind, and lack of sunshine?

I would have to say not me.

Anyway, Monday involved the adventure of going on a long run with Nancy and Tammy and getting seriously drenched. This soaking had the added plus of making you feel like you were running with leg weights strapped to your calves, only it was just your very wet running pants.

After getting dried out, I took Jackson to the doctor for a little cold he has. Guess what?? We got stuck in the rain. Here's the picture I'd like to paint for you: Me, clutching my poor, coughing four year old to me, running through deep puddles, trying to find the right street. Eventually, we did get there, and as we sat, shivering, in the waiting room, Jackson looked at me and said, "Mommy, I need to fix your hair." I told him it was just wet, and he replied, "I really need to fix it." Wow. It's so sweet how he appreciates that I just risked pneumonia or at the least ruined shoes for him.

We got the prescriptions, etc, and headed for home, after strict orders from the doctor for Jackson and me to get a hot shower!

The next day, we had some family time. The pictures are of us at some local ruins (I'll have to find out what they're called), and of Nate the Archaelogist. We had stopped by the site the team is building on (they're starting a bath house for the police), and there, in a pile of dirt, Nate discovered this bayonet. Someone said it was an antique, and when we googled it, it showed up as a bayonet from the 1800's. How cool is that?

Oh, and it looks like we're getting more rain today. Guess we sure do need it.

What Did You Do Today?

2008-06-03T22:29:00.003-04:00

Here's Steve's answer to that question!

He has been overseeing the set-up for Posada Dona Luisa, the hotel that our church has been blessed to lease as a mission house. The first team came this week, and before they arrived, a vacant room had to be completely remade into a kitchen. Hours (like 2!) before the team showed up, the plumber was still installing the sink, Nancy Watkins was putting things together and preparing to cook dinner for 20 people, and Steve had to leave in the middle of the chaos to pick the travellers up from the airport. Whew.

Here are some pictures of the hotel, the staff, and Nancy, Chelsea, and Amber working in the kitchen.

2008-06-01T10:49:00.004-04:00

Happiness is....

A family night in the city, watching Prince Caspian (in English!), making a stop at McD's, and falling asleep on the car ride back (the kids, not Steve)

A water "balloon" (actually filled sandwich baggies) fight with the neighbors....

Getting two suitcases filled with goodies from home, reminding us that we are thought of, prayed for, loved...

Don't Drink the Water

2008-05-29T10:13:00.002-04:00

OK, rule number one is just that: Don't drink the water. I didn't, but apparently my body thought I had. And Nate's body thought the same. Oh, and Steve's wasn't far behind.

So, now that we're back in the land of those who can happily consume food and liquid again (yes! A cracker never tasted so good!), I thought I'd share the last few days.

Steve has been busy (understatement) getting ready for the Pathways team coming. He had literally 12 pages of notes he'd taken during a meeting, and everything in those notes had to be done. Miraculously, they are getting done. He's also been responsible for overseeing and actually helping with repairs and improvements to the hotel the church has leased. He's done so well, and since I am writing this entry, I'll just take the time to brag on his Spanish. Everyone has complimented him on how well he speaks and understands, and he is quick to give the credit to God for refreshing his mind, since he hasn't taken classes since high school! (And we won't even mention how long ago THAT was.)

There are many ministries for me to get involved in, too, but I am really praying and waiting for God to lead before I jump in, since my time is so limited. Just keeping the house running, doing school, etc., has kept me hoppin, and now I'll be adding Spanish classes. Woa. Pour me an extra shot of espresso, please. I really want the ministries I choose to be things I am passionate about, not just time-wasters and energy-drainers. Been there.

We're planning a fun family day for tomorrow, so pictures ARE coming, but I had to close with this thought from Jackson. It was pretty profound to my oh-so-unbiased ears.

He was playing with an Evange-Cube (like a Rubix Cube, with pictures showing the story of Jesus' death and resurrection), and as he sat, staring at the picture of Jesus on the cross, he said (insert a little four year old voice here), "God doesn't bewong on the cross. He doesn't live der. He lives in our hearts."

I think he just said it all.

Interview

2008-05-25T16:35:00.004-04:00

The following is an actual transcript of a recent interview with Shelby Otto, age 7.

What do you like about Guatemala?
I like about Guatemala that we have a good neighborhood and we're having a great time.

What do you miss?
I miss everyone.

What do you like to see when we're walking around?
I like to see horses pulling carriages, and I like to see chicken buses.

How do you like our dates?
Very good, they're the best dates I ever had down here.
*Editor's note: Our dates are mostly to go to the bagel wifi cafe and play Webkins.

Anything else you'd like to say?
I miss my friends in Florida, but I'm having a great time down here because we get to spend family time and my mom loves me. And that's it. Bye.

Bravery

2008-05-23T00:46:00.002-04:00

Habakkuk 3:19 (Amplified Bible)

19The Lord God is my Strength, my personal bravery, and my invincible army; He makes my feet like hinds' feet and will make me to walk [not to stand still in terror, but to walk] and make [spiritual] progress upon my high places [of trouble, suffering, or responsibility]!

I need more than my own bravery today. Oh. I guess that would be any day.
Bravery not to run back to my oh-so-comfortable life.
Bravery not to fall apart when my kids get sick (like this week).
Bravery not to simply react to things, but to be full of the Spirit and act out of His flowing.
Bravery not to be crushed when people disappoint and don't help the way I'd like. (It IS all about me, isn't it??)

I want to be brave. He is brave enough for me.
Oh, yes, and I guess Jackson needs to be brave, because he told me this week, as I was mopping, that I scared him when I cleaned. Wow. Guess I'd better never try that one again!

Ask

2008-05-15T16:13:00.003-04:00

There are times when I don't get the answers to prayer that I want. The difference in my heart now (and I know this is only because of the Holy Spirit's kneading and tendering my heart) is that I trust Him more. If He says no, I can believe He has a reason, or as I learned from Beth Moore, "a greater yes." Even if it's not the yes I wanted, I have seen enough miracles happen in my life to know that, if I am patient (sort-of!) and surrendered, I may eventually see the reason. Not always, but sometimes. And the reasons I don't see now, I will see one day.

I imagine it like this: I am looking at a huge painting, only it is covered by a screen or cloth of some kind. One day, when I know as I am known, I picture Jesus pulling back the screen, and I will say, "Oh." Nothing will need to be explained. I will know, and every unanswered question will make perfect sense.

A missionary friend spoke at church Sunday and gave one of the best illustrations I've heard about how we don't "get" God. Picture an ant looking at a person. All he can see is the human's shoe, and he keeps saying, "Wow! You are big. You are REALLY huge!" The human says, "Well, yes, I'm big, but there's a lot more than that! I'm more than just a big foot." That is how I look at God...I know He's big, but I don't get HOW big, and how much more there is to Him, how complex and amazing He is.

But another wonderful thing I've learned about God is this: He is so gentle with me. Even though He doesn't have to, He answers little and big prayers for me. This happened several times this week, and it built my faith at a time when I sorely needed it! Our new (new to us!) car died in the middle of Parque Central, and I was sitting in it, alone, with three kiddos. Only God gave me the Spirit-filling to thank Him, aloud, and mean it. We did. Then we told the enemy that it was a nice try, but it wasn't going to work on us! We wanted to learn whatever God had for us. After an interesting interval that included the police coming, telling us to MOVE! ("Mi carro es muerte!"), Steve and bystanders pushing it, more bystanders giving advice, interesting bystanders asking for money, and Nancy very kindly getting the kids and me home, Steve and Antonio (he works at the church) towed the carro muerte (translation: dead car) home. The next day, Steve was able to replace the battery, and the dead was raised to life! Praise for a simple fix!

The very next day, God provided a sweet, romantic evening for Steve and I...much needed. We walked around town, explored, found some cool shops, and stumbled upon a lovely restaurant. It was part cafe, part French bakery, and Steve even got me to admit, without choking on my croissant, that their cafe mochas blew Starbucks away. Not to mention the fact that our little table, complete with flowers and candles, was directly under a photo of Scarlett and Rhett! Go figure! A Guatemalan/French/Southern date. God is too good to me!

The last answers came today. Some things pressing on my heart, things I had been praying hard for were answered almost before I finished praying, literally more than I could ask or imagine. Way more. I could almost cry thinking about it. I just might.

John 14:13-15 You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.

*And just to show God's sense of humor, the photo shows the back of the van that stopped to help jump our car. It's for a funeral home. Too much!

Mom's Day

2008-05-11T13:19:00.006-04:00

Happy Mother's Day

In honor of Mother's Day, I'm posting pictures my kids have taken. Before we left Florida, a kind neighbor gave our kids a nice digital camera that they've used to take movies and photos. Here is their perspective of Guatemala.

The Comforter

2008-05-04T20:04:00.003-04:00

Warning: Honesty ahead.

Today was hard.
Just.
Plain.
Hard.
I've known hard before, but this is a new hard, a different hard.

It started last night, when we were picking up a few things at the Bodegona (grocery). This came at the end of a long shopping trip to the market, which is completely overwhelming for me. Picture an open-air market like you've seen in a movie, and you've got it. Throw in a language you don't know well, the challenge of price-haggling, live pigs and chickens for sale and some interesting smells, and you have my version of Publix. Thankfully, Dayle was with me to guide and help, but it is still exhausting. Anyway, there were other things to get, and the Bode is small, crowded, and hard to navigate. Plus I have to translate every box and bottle I pick up. So, when I realized that I had set our freshly-purchased ice cream somewhere and couldn't find it, I started to cry. About ice cream. Only it wasn't about ice cream.

Today started very early with a robbery at the church. Everyone has handled the news well, and everyone banded together for the service to go forwards. It was just another hard thing to hear, to feel.

Just before we left the U.S., I bought a book called "Walking With God, " by John Eldredge. I know it was exactly what God wanted me to hear at this time, and today, I was reminded of a passage in it: "Once we are in the kingdom that is yet to come, once the world has been restored to all it was meant to be, then we will be able to live without interruption, without assault. Then we can drop our guard. But not until then. Not even in moments of tenderness and sorrow; I know it seems unfair, but the enemy does not play fair. He is an opportunist. Knowing this will help."

It did help to know that I had a choice: I could lie down and have a pity party,let the enemy's tactics work, be miserable for days and take my family on the trip with me, or I could feel the pain, the hurt, the tiredness, and beg God to heal my heart. No one else can do it, not my husband, not my friends. I need all of them, we need each other, but only God can change my heart.

Eldredge's book was, for me, a lesson in learning to hear God's voice, learning to trust what He says and obey it. I feel like I was rarely taught about the Holy Spirit for most of my life, because many of the churches I went to were afraid to teach Him. It was all or nothing, and they chose nothing. This is a new thing for me, these last few years, listening to God, and I usually long for my safety zone of just doing what I logically think is right. Unfortunately, I end up choosing the path of my flesh, trying to protect myself from hurt, or from looking foolish, or from being disappointed. I can't protect myself from those things anyway, but I sure do try, and I end up with a hardened, cynical heart.

Right after I finished Eldredge's book, I "happened" to come across "Fresh Power" by Jim Cymbala. Same conviction. Listen to the Holy Spirit. Realize that His power is life, breath, everything. It's not programs, it's not even instruments...some of which we were lacking this morning at church. And yet we worshiped.

I need to hear from Him, to be comforted and guided. I love how Eldredge put it:
"...I'm not encouraging a senseless approach to life. I'm not saying you should follow every thought that passes through your head. There is wisdom, and there is revelation. They go together, hand in hand. 'I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better' (Eph. 1:17)." We need both, a balance. Not just a longing for revelation, but wisdom as well.

John 14:26 (Amplified)
But the Comforter (Counselor, Helper, Intercessor, Advocate, Strengthener, Standby), the Holy Spirit, Whom the Father will send in My name [in My place, to represent Me and act on My behalf], He will teach you all things. And He will cause you to recall (will remind you of, bring to your remembrance) everything I have told you.
27Peace I leave with you; My [own] peace I now give and bequeath to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. [Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled.]

Motos and Mayhem

2008-05-03T20:45:00.005-04:00

You know your life is adventurous when even the other missionaries around you are shaking their heads and listing all the things that have happened in your three week tenure on the mission field!

On my last post, I mentioned that I was going to Guatemala City with the other ladies to get away. We did. It was full of fun, laughs and shopping for the church and our homes at Price Smart (like Sam's) and Hieper Paiz (like Wal-Mart). We headed back to Antigua loaded down with stuff (mostly a plethora of toilet paper... who knew a church needed so much??), and everything was just peachy, until what I am starting to think of as my "jinx effect" kicked in. One lady, Tammy, asked, "What is that smell, and is it US?" No sooner had the prophetic words left her mouth then all the dashboard lights went on and the van went off. Praise the Lord, we were near a shoulder, which isn't always available around here.

So, here we were, 7 ladies (one pregnant...not me) on the side of the road with a van full of stuff (did I mention the t.p.?). Amazingly, some very nice people stopped and tried to help. They couldn't, but we thanked them and invited them to church on Sunday. Then, a car of 3 men pulled over...and "coincidentally," they were mechanics with plenty of tools! They started working on the van while we waited for some men from the church who were on the way!

In the meantime, we waited, snacked on some of our goodies, and one brave woman (Tonja) even chased away some stray dogs with a wrench.

We made it back safely, albeit exhausted. So, Friday, I decided to try a getaway again. This time, Amber went with me to negotiate furniture prices, and we got some beautiful, inexpensive things that make our house so much homier. This went so well that Amber mentioned that I hadn't had any adventures that day. She shouldn't have said that. We went together to get haircuts, and I was brave (foolish) enough to get my roots done. Well, they're done. Sort of a grayish done. The foiling was just like I'm used to, but when the girl rinsed my hair and then ran out of the room to get something, I started to panic. When she began RUBBING some foul, bleachy smelling stuff into my hair, I felt like I could go into that hysterical laughing, crying thing. I didn't. Until later.

Amber kept saying, "It looks really dark, " and that was putting it very, very kindly. Let me just say I am missing my good friend Betty Klepacki.

Since that didn't go so well, we decided to try a movie. At a cool place we found, the movie is free if you buy food, and 27 Dresses was playing. Well, I can honestly say I have SEEN the movie, but HEARING it was not to be. Apparently, a school program/awards ceremony was taking place literally on the other side of the wall, and it was on surround sound instead of the movie. Amber and I could do nothing but laugh. Oh well. The moto ride there and back was enough fun for the night!!

Water, Water Everywhere! (Almost!)

2008-04-30T21:41:00.004-04:00

Steve and I both came to the same conclusion today. Instead of wondering, will something happen today, we are asking, "WHAT will today's adventure be?"

In a nutshell, here's what today's adventures were:

I'll start with one from Monday. The pharmacy gave me Shelby's meds in powdered form. I've never mixed antibiotics myself! God blessed us with kind neighbors who are eye doctors and they explained the whole thing to us! Thank the Lord!

I went on a 5 mile run with Nancy and her friend, Tammy. The combination of the altitude and the hills about killed me, but I felt great afterwards!

We sprung a leak in the kitchen, and for the entire day have had a hole in the wall with water coming out (at a pretty decent rate). At least it is running into the drain in the laundry "room" (I use this term loosely!)The plumber has to come back tomorrow, because the shut-off valve to our house is the only one in the complex that doesn't work!!

We have not caught the mouse yet. Perhaps the water scared him away.

The roofers were all pounding at one time on our heads. This made school....interesting. I've never YELLED MATH QUESTIONS BEFORE.

Because of the roofing, we now have skylights in some of our bedrooms. Nate was resting on our bed and got a nice shower from the worker's water bottles being dumped! Shelby and Jack weren't too keen on the rocks, dirt and dead bugs falling on their beds!

Steve has been assisting in a lot of church stuff.

Mama needs a little break, so she is headed into Guatemala City with the other ladies manana!

Last but not least, we were brought to tears (mostly me crying!) due to a suitcase full of amazing gifts from my parents and the Palm family. You guys are too good to us!

Setting Up Shop

2008-04-27T20:48:00.001-04:00

Last night was the first night where we actually took an hour and forced ourselves to sit, read, and watch part of a DVD together. As Jessica wrote in an entry a few days ago, the logistics of every day life are much more complicated, slower, and require extreme flexibility, and we are forced to focus more on relationships and less on tasks. A second round of physical exhaustion hit last night as we wrapped up another day of lifting, climbing, and painting. Week two is drawing to an end, and the list of tasks to set up shop here at the house is finally shifting from major items to decorating details.

Yet, even with the shift of focus, the tasks are limitless. Now that the applicances are in, the paint is on the walls, and the 20+ suitcases have been unpacked and put away, the to-do list isn't any shorter. Instead, the mind races to the next "thing" that will really make the place feel like home. Curtains, patching rusted-out holes in the doors (had a mouse in the house last night), etc.

In the middle of the exhaustion, our son Nate broke down last night and started sobbing. He wanted to go back to America. Sorry we had ever moved here. We held him and let him get it all out, prayed together, and shared some stories. We spent a lot of time teaching him that he is now a threat to Satan's kingdom, because he has been used powerfully in the last two weeks to encourage the rest of the family as we have each hit our own emotional brick walls. He has graduated from child to warrior, private first class, and he drew blood. He got it. We shared a few stories about my days at the Air Force Academy (he really liked these), how for 6 weeks the upper class cadets make it their full-time job to get the weak ones to quit. Those who survive the last "hell week" which ends with a difficult march into the hills, are rewarded a ceremony and the prized "prop and wings", a pin which symbolizes authentic cadet status. Quitting in week one, two, or three erases the opportunity to go on. Even making it half-way up the hill with the rest of your comrades still is worthless. Finishing strong is everything. And yet, this only prepares and propells the cadet into another full year of oppression by the upperclass cadets, followed by three more years of difficult academic loads. But at the end, the reward of being an officer, a leader, and a warrior for our country.

It was with this mindset that I woke up this morning. Exhausted and drained from the hauling, lifting, and fighting for our family.

I had been reading Erwin McManus' book The Barbarian Way over the last several months, and I picked it up again. Here is what God had in store as I read:

"Jesus leads us into the heart of the dark kingdom, into the soul of what is most evil. He takes us where mankind has chosen to live. He calls us to where the darkness has made those who wander there desparate for light. He leads us as warriors of light to risk our lives for the deliverance of others. Again, our own weapons are love, hope, and faith, and they are our only defense. Yet we above all know that they and only they liberate us and fulfill the deepest longings of our souls."

We are here, not to set up shop, but to set up God's kindgom in the darkness. We must travel light, and be prepared to move on. Watching our son choose to turn agony and tears from oppression into laughter and another day of encouragement drove the point home for me.

Jesus describes it as "the kingdom of heaven has been forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it" (Matt 11:12) underscores the battle. Jesus was referring to the message that John the Baptist brought, that the physical kingdom was replaced by a spiritual one. That the weapons of the Isrealites had been traded in for the weapons of faith, hope, and love.

In God's kindom, location, status, and age are irrelevant. A pastor's counseling session, talking to a neighbor, mission field, or business boardroom are all encompassed by the battlefield. Church members fight alongside their pastor. And a child can wield these weapons with the most educated seminary graduate.

Pray for more faith, that we will raise the shield together for our King!

In Which I Become Well Acquainted With the Guatemalan Medical System...

2008-04-25T21:05:00.004-04:00

Well, then. O.K. I give. I thought I'd learned before that my expectations were just that, mine. But apparently, I'm holding onto them much more tightly than I thought.

We made our plans for yesterday and had quite the to-do list. However, we realized that Shelby needed a trip to the doctor (something minor but that just wouldn't go away) so I thought, OK, we can do this, no big deal. Ahem. Wrong. Around 8 in the morning, we drove to the doctor's (recommended by another missionary). I found out that their hours for the day were 11-12 and then 4-6, so we'd have to come back, and there would be a line waiting. Here's how the rest of the day went:

1. Shelby and I went back at 10 a.m. to wait.
2. The doctor saw us at 11. He was very, very nice, spoke beautiful English, and wanted to run several tests. No problem. Except we'd have to go to the lab.
3. Shelby and I walked a few blocks to find the lab. It was #15A, but there were several #15A's. We found the right one, but I seriously felt like I was in a movie, because it looked like it was someone's house.We communicated in some Spanish, and the nice lady asked us to come back at 2 p.m. No problem.
4. Shelby and I walked (and got lost) and walked and found the Bagel Barn (the cafe and wifi spot I'm at now). We had a sweet time eating bagels with cream cheese and nutella, chatting, playing Webkins, having girl time.
5. Shelby and I walked (and got lost some more) and found the lab again. The nice lady did the necessary tests and sent us away with a request for a stool sample.
6. Shelby and I walked (far) to the Bodegona (grocery) where the boys picked us up. She was such a little trooper and never complained.
7. At 5 p.m., I dropped off the sample. On Saturday morning, I'm supposed to go back to the lab, pick up the results, and take them to the doctor at 4 on Monday for his diagnosis.

Whew. I started to feel sorry for myself and this "wasted" day, until I realized that maybe, just maybe, God had His own expectations for my day, and maybe they were less about doing and more about the gift of time with my girl. Amazing how that changed my perspective!

But wait, there's more....Steve and I took Matt and Ale Watkins and Amber Watkins to dinner to thank them for their help. We had a great time and great food, and headed home around 8. When we got home, we found a very concerned Nancy, because no one had seen or heard from Mike for 2 hours, and he was very late getting home. When she finally reached him, he told her he'd been in an accident on his Moto, but he hung up before giving her the address. Steve, Amber, Nancy,and I jumped into the car and began looking for him. Finally, Nancy got ahold of him, and he was in an ambulance being taken to the hospital. He'd been hit by another moto (someone ran a stop sign) and had broken his ankle in a few places. He had surgery today and will need lots of prayer during his recovery. Pray for Steve, too, as this means he'll be jumping into things sooner!

We had a huge gift today....a team from YWAM had an open afternoon, and so all 8 of them came and started painting our house! It's amazing what a little color will do. They got the downstairs mostly done and started on the upstairs, and saved us so much time. What a blessing God gave us.

In the midst of our tiredness and temptation to yield to frustration (which, oh yes, we have done!), we are reminded that God is very near, is very good, is so trustworthy and gentle with us. This is so real to us now. Keep up the prayers, and we are praying for all of you, too!

To Quote a 4-Year Old, "Are We In The World?"

2008-04-23T16:50:00.003-04:00

As the title suggests, Jackson is not sure where we are. Yesterday, his mommy and daddy weren't sure either. First of all, I have to give huge kudos to my amazingly brave hubby for driving to and through Guatemala City. Wow. I can't even count the times we were almost squished. (Dad, you might not want to read this part). We DID learn that if I stuck my hand out the window when we wanted over, it worked much, much better than a signal. Go figure. I'll try sticking my head out next time. This blond hair might as well be good for something!

We found the stores we needed and navigated them fairly well. Our list of things to get back when we're home is growing, especially when I saw my contact solution for over $10 a bottle! Gulp. When we bagged our stuff and headed back for Antigua, we learned our most valuable lesson yet. No matter what, don't ever, ever, ever miss your turn. Because, apparently, there is a law against left-hand turns or u-turns of any kind. Poor Steve. Our joke for our whole marriage has been that his middle name is u-turn, so he is in some serious withdrawal. Is there a Celebrate Recovery for that? After we drove through some, ah, interesting traffic and got a nice tour of the city (and ignored the powerful urge to drive our car across the tall concrete median!) we found the only, and I DO mean only left turnaround. You better believe we didn't miss a single turn after that!

When we made it down the winding roads to Antigua, it felt so much quieter and more peaceful! We decided, after such an exhausting 6 hour jaunt, we would splurge on the Dominoes' Tuesday night buy-one-get-one free pizza special, which I managed to order in Spanish! Yeah! Strangely, when we pulled into our compound, all was VERY peaceful....and VERY dark. Ah. Now we got introduced to the latest adventure, the rolling blackout. Apparently, Guatemala is suffering from the higher fuel costs just like everyone else, so we may be having a lot of these. Hence, we enjoyed a pizza dinner by candlelight and went to bed by flashlight. The blackout lasted about 5 hours, and everything kicked back on by 11. Praises.

Today's adventures were awesome! I was never so excited to do a load of laundry in my life, as Steve got our new washer and dryer to work, despite the fact that it took much translation and several trips to different hardwarish stores. My dials on the washer are in Spanish, but I am guessing pretty well so far! We learned how to make the kitchen functional, how to disinfect our fruits and veggies, and how to make our new house a home! The kids are doing awesome and are teaching us grown-ups a thing or two about adapting and adjusting. Guess our new middle name needs to change from u-turn to flexibility! We miss all of you!

Once We Found the Church...

2008-04-20T18:03:00.002-04:00

OK, so today was a good lesson in not making assumptions. I assumed that Steve knew where the church was. He assumed that he knew, too. I was proud of him for stopping to ask directions (in Espanol, no less...he's amazing!), but it turned out that we had our streets and avenues mixed up. Here, they run opposite of the US.
We did make it eventually, and the kiddos were so excited to be in their new classes. The teachers had even gotten vests ready for them (think AWANA), and made them feel at home. Steve and I could follow the service really well, since everything is bilingual, and we even paid attention. This could be because Mike made us sit on the FRONT ROW, and only slightly embarrassed us by announcing our (semi) late arrival.
I conquered the local ATM today, too. After you pass the guard with a machine gun (yikes!), you go into a booth (like a tiny room) which smells suspiciously like something I won't mention, and you seriously get like 10 seconds to make your selection. I had to go through the whole process 3-4 times because, of course, it was all in Spanish, and I kept guessing what each button meant. I guessed wrong. I got money out finally, though, and the guard didn't even make me leave!

We're out at our wi-fi spot checking emails and listening to the rain falling outside. We just want to thank all of you who have read our blog, emailed, posted comments, etc. It's impossible to even put into words how much it means that you all are thinking of us and praying for us. Hasta luego!

First 5 Days

2008-04-18T22:18:00.009-04:00

Whew... we made it through a lot of changes this week! In a nutshell:

Monday: See last journal entry.

Tuesday: (click on any picture to make it larger)
Travelled 6 hours round-trip on Mike's Birthday to purchase a vehicle. Saw mountains, jungle, lakes, and a rainstorm (see pic). Felt great, just soaking everything in.

Wednesday:
Had some freedom to explore Antigua with the vehicle, and got lunch together (kids had smiley-face pancakes which was a hit). Very tiring day, time-changes and all started to really catch up with us. Unpacked a lot of suitcases. Got a picture of the view from our balcony...wow!

Thursday: Spiritual battle in the morning as we started to feel overwhelmed. A lot of prayer, sitting around the table sharing high-lows (best & worst moments) each morning followed by each of us praying for each others' struggles paid off, since we stuck together as a family and didn't pretend we weren't all wrestling with at least something. Thanks to everyone praying for us also, because we cheered throughout the afternoon together how God helped us win the battle. Our kids (especially Nate) have been extremely positive, reminding us that God is testing us and we need to trust Him. So much insight this week into ourselves and our children as we rode the elation/exhaustion roller coaster. Talking to several of the families already here has also taken off a huge load. Not surprisingly, everyone could empathize and we got to laugh ourselves through their stories of their first week here. Picked up a stove/fridge which was another step in making the house feel like home.

Friday (today):
Went to the market with the kids this morning and had an enjoyable time looking at basics for the house and toys for the kids. We had someone watch our kiddos so we could go on a date, and we hit a local WiFi cafe and enjoyed mocha and a bagel together! We shopped together and stocked up our fridge (navigating the local grocery store was a huge triumph!) Today, we started to truly have some fun and feel more relaxed.

Please continue to pray. We know that each day will hold a new opportunity for good, and we claim that!!

P.S. Betty sent us a picture of our commissioning service at our church. Pastor Bill had our church pray over us, and sent us off with the church's full support - thank you!!!

Yep, We're Here

2008-04-15T11:36:00.002-04:00

Ever have the feeling that you're walking around like you're underwater, like you are moving forward, but everything is moving v-e-r-r-r-r-y s-l-o-o-o-w-ly. That's us today. Yesterday was adrenaline-filled and exciting. The flights went well, the kids did great. ALL of our luggage made it....nothing broken that we can tell so far. So, so much to praise God for.
Last night, the time change/altitude change/early morning caught up with us, and I'm pretty sure I made not one intelligent comment all evening. Pastor Mike, Nancy, and Amber had made our new home look so clean, lovely, even putting out flowers, setting up our kitchen with essentials, leaving sweet name tags and cookies on the pillows, etc. We got everyone settled down for the night, and as I was sitting in bed, reading, my bed began to move back and forth. It took a minute to register that it was, indeed, an earthquake. I ran out into the hall by the kids' rooms (they slept through it), and the walls were moving. After everything stopped (including my heart!), Steve came running over to check on us (he'd been at Mike and Nancy's checking email). We thank the Lord that the kids didn't get hurt or scared, that the power stayed on, that everyone was ok. What an initiation to Guatemala!
Stay tuned for more adventures!!!

Almost Adios

2008-04-12T22:00:00.005-04:00

I'm typing this blog from my parents' home, where I sit surrounded by suitcases! There are really only a fraction of the whole here. Tomorrow, we're filling up a van with 18 more cases, pretty much all of our earthly possessions.
This week has been a rollercoaster of emotions, with the goodbyes beginning. There will be more tomorrow at church at our going-away party. And more again Monday. God has given us strength for these, and I am depending on that in the days to come. He will be strong for us. More to come....

Luggage

2008-04-04T20:30:00.005-04:00

This week marked quite a turning point on our journey to serving in Guatemala. We have gone from counting months, to weeks, to days (only 9) until we leave. So, this week we became truly mobile. Well, if you consider 21 suitcases mobile.

Quite an eventful week, as we moved out of the temporary home (courtesy of Jessica's brother and his family) and began a two-week transition, more packing, and traveling to see family and friends before we leave.

Road Tripping Again

2008-03-20T12:37:00.006-04:00

We love a road trip. The kids pop out of bed way before dawn, dressed and ready to go, super-pumped. Part of the excitement might be the enormous quantities of fun junk food we know we'll be consuming on the road, not to mention the hours of movies to be watched on the laptop (not by Steve, he has to drive).

The fact that we start our trip out with a stop at our favorite donut shop (the Lighthouse on Indian Rocks Beach...yum!) and an extra-hot Starbucks, extra-caffeinated doesn't hurt. By 9:30 when the sugar buzz has worn off and the kids are clamoring for the Holy Grail of road trip stops (that would be McDonald's, in case you don't have kids under 10), we fill up on carbs and sugar again and are good to go for another few hours, um, I mean miles.

Anyways, our last trip was 2 weeks ago, and we were headed to Ft. Walton Beach, FL, where we'd been stationed at Hurlburt Field from 1994-1996. We love our church family there at Hollywood Boulevard Baptist. They shower us with such love, care, prayers, and make us feel like we're back home after a long absence. The body of Christ is an amazing thing.

Oh, yeah. And they feed us very well, too.

On the way home, we had planned to stop at the Armament Museum near Eglin AFB. Nate had been talking about it for months, but that last morning, as we got ready to leave, we were told that it was closed. Instead of getting angry or sulking (like I would've done!), Nate told Steve, "Dad, that's ok. Let's just be thankful for what we HAVE gotten to do on this trip." Wow. Amazing.

The cool thing is that, while the inside of the museum was closed, the outside, packed with static aircraft displays was open, and we had a wonderful time exploring and taking pictures. The gift shop was open as well, and everyone got a great souvenir of our visit. We all cheered and clapped, thankful for God spoiling us with a mini-vacation, an encouraging time with friends, and, oh yes, great eats (McD's notwithstanding!)

Life in a 4X4 Box

2008-03-06T17:04:00.005-05:00

First of all, a few months ago, I didn't know what a pallet was. Apparently, it's a 4 foot by 4 foot crate to fill with all your wordly possessions. Then, you itemize each and every thing (note to self: do not pack weapons, contraband of any nature, or worse, chocolate, which might melt).
Next, you bid adieu to said possessions, hoping that they make it in some sort of resemblance to one piece to your destination, across many treacherous miles.
Now, we're in step one of this process. Today, we packed our pallet. It's amazing how much stuff I'm realizing I can (try to) live without. Well, aside from the shoes. Those are a must-have.
However, I'm wondering about one thing. Do you think it's a bad sign that our shipping company isn't answering our calls?
Just wondering.